Last Updated on August 31, 2020

If you try to open your woman sexually and approach her the same way you want to be aroused, then you are most likely failing.

Here’s the thing, what works for you, usually doesn’t work for her.

As a man, what opens you up is adoration and what I call “cock worshipping” (yes, that’s a thing, and I teach that in my online course for women, The Touch Of Love). While for a woman, what opens her up is emotional connection and safety.

To experience a deep sexual connection with a woman, you need to create a safe container for her.

We’ve previously looked into how as a man it is your responsibility to create the banks for the flowing feminine to be contained (if you haven’t read my article, check it out here). You want to be able to take her where she can’t bring herself. 

READ THIS: THE 3 KEYS TO HELPING A WOMAN ORGASM

By safety, I am talking about the emotional part of it, rather than the physical. Sure, physical security is important too; it is essential for a woman to know that you will be the one to get up in the middle of the night if there’s a suspicious noise, or that you have the physical strength to defend her physically. But the focus of this article goes deeper.

Today, we are focusing on providing emotional safety so she can fully open herself up to you sexually. 

There’s nothing more attractive than a woman who can ultimately let go and surrender to her wild sexual expression. 

YOU MUST CREATE A SAFE SPACE

First, it starts with yourself, and your ability to having integrity and keeping your word. When you follow through on what you say you will do. When you do the right thing, even though it is fucking hard. She needs to know that she can trust you through and through.

You create safety by being present and passionate about her. When you show up fully and take a stand for what you believe in. When you are in your masculine power, it doesn’t mean you can’t show weakness; it simply means that you are willing to show up.

She wants to know that you can take all of her, her sweet, compassionate side and her darkest side. Be her rock, handle whatever she throws at you, and stay with her through it.

You create safety by offering a listening ear when you can encourage her to talk even when she shuts down emotionally when you can listen without fixing her or offering advice. That one is a biggy. Often she only needs to be heard and seen, not changed. 

She will open sexually when you open her emotionally.

BE ALL IN

Commit fully to the relationship, lead her, and be willing to share intimate experiences. Your emotional connection to her profoundly affects your sex life. 

Your biggest strength is your vulnerability. Your willingness to share your feelings, hopes, aspirations, and fears with honesty. When you do so from a desire to connect, it creates a special bond and trust.

You let her in. Your power lies in your heart.

If you can look at every aspect of yourself, even the ones that you don’t like, you can take a woman to new sexual and emotional edges. Because you don’t fear your own shadow, you create safety for her to unveil every part of herself—even the ones that are scary for her.

She wants to trust and feel your strength. She wants to know that you can handle all of her. And ultimately, she wants you to make love to her like there’s no tomorrow.

When a woman feels safe, she opens up, relaxes, and has a certain glow to her. You know—that radiance that is so sexy; that smile that melts your heart: those big eyes full of devotion. You want to be around her, and touch her because you can’t get enough. 

By creating a safe space for your woman, you will be giving her the greatest gift: loving her enough that she can fully let go and give you what she’s never given any other man.