12 More Sex Myths Busted

Kevin Anthony 0:11
Welcome to the Love Lab podcast a safe place to get real about sex. Whether you’re a man or woman single or a couple, this is the show for you.

Céline Remy 0:20
We are your hosts, Kevin Anthony and Céline Remy and we are here to guide you to go from good to amazing in the bedroom and beyond.

Kevin Anthony 0:28
All right, welcome back to the Love Lab podcast. This is episode 263. And it is titled 12 More Sex Myths Busted. So a couple of years ago, Celine and I did an episode (it was episode 132), and it was called 10, six myths everyone thinks are true. And basically, we took 10 Sex myths and we busted them. So this is kind of a follow-up to that because it’s been a few years, and I have 12 More Sex Myths Busted. As always, my ideas for these shows generally come from things that have happened recently. So why did I decide to make another episode on sex myths busted? Because I had a comment on YouTube recently, where somebody was mentioning a really big myth and saying that it was true. And I thought, wow, that that’s absolutely not true. And I should talk about the fact that that’s not true. And so that kind of inspired me to go back and find some more sex myths. So I asked some colleagues in the space, what they thought. And then, of course, I got out onto the old Internet and wanted to see what are some of the more common myths that we see today.

Obviously, the ones that we did in the previous episode are pretty common. So it’s definitely worth going and checking that episode out for more common myths. So like, you might be saying, Well, why didn’t he mention this one’s probably because it was in the previous episode. And there are a lot of sex myths out there that are just really dumb. I mean, really dumb. I’m not even going to touch the ones that are that stupid, because hopefully, you all listening to this are smart enough to know that those things are ridiculous. So I will not be addressing those, you know, some of the really ridiculous ones come from these lists of like, common myths about sex that teens believe so, you know, they’re the sort of childish things that get passed, you know, amongst young people. We will not be talking about any of those today. But we will be talking about some good ones. There are some really good ones here.

Okay, before I get into the actual myths, Power and Mastery 3.0 is here. The men’s sexual Mastery program you have heard about on the show for a long time is now even better. I have personally reviewed every module lesson video, audio, and PDF to see if there’s anything new that needed to be added. As a result, I have added 10 New videos one new audio eight new PDFs, and dozens of links to handpick products to help support your journey to mastery. In addition, there is also a brand new user interface that makes it easier to navigate the course and find your course materials. So if you are ready to become the sexual Master, you have always wanted to be then go to powerandmastery.com That is powerandmastery.com. I am really proud of this course, I’ve always been saline and I did a fantastic job. And now I feel like it’s even better. It was a project that Céline and I started and I have now finished. And if you’ve been on the fence wondering whether or not this is the right program for you, now is definitely the time to get in there. So powerandmastery.com.

Okay, these myths are not in any particular order. They’re just kind of a brainstorming list. Some of them will be really fast. Some of them I will talk about in a little bit more depth. So here we go. Number one, orgasm is the end of sex. This one actually came from asking a colleague, and it was the very first thing that popped into her mind. I said, Hey, I’m thinking about doing an episode on busting some sex admits You got any I mean, this immediately came out. orgasm is the end of sex. So that is actually a myth that you hear and I still When I worked with people say, Well, you know, and then he had an orgasm, so we were done. Okay, isn’t there anything else that could potentially be done? Of course, there is. So orgasm, or orgasm. orgasm is not the end of sex for either men or women. So let’s talk about women quickly here. Women can have endless numbers of orgasms. And if you’ve ever really learned how to master your ejaculation and make love to a woman for hours and take her through these multiple waves of orgasm, you know she can have as many orgasms as she wants. You know, I’ve had lovers who were like, I didn’t think I could go anymore. I was about to tap out and say, I’m done, and then there was another one and another one had another one.

So it is absolutely possible for women to have multiple orgasms. So obviously, having an orgasm does not mean the end of sex. Now, I started talking with him because most people are aware of that. However, they still believe that when a man ejaculates/orgasms, that that is the end of sex. So the first thing I’ll say about that is this. Even if a manager circulates, and that is it, he loses his erection. That doesn’t mean that the physical act of lovemaking has to stop. There are lots of other things that you can do. You can use your hands, you can use your mouth, you there are, you know, there are tons of different things that you can do, you can use toys. So there are lots of other things that you can do to continue the act of being sexual with your partner. Now, I paused a little bit because that’s the easy answer. Right? The easy answer is well, of course you know, you can use a vibrator, use your hands, go down on her, whatever you can keep the sex going.

However, another part that is often misunderstood is that men can also have multiple orgasms. They are not ejaculatory orgasms generally. Why? Well, because when a man does ejaculate there, he will generally lose his erection. And then there’s a refractory period, which is a certain amount of time, roughly 20 ish minutes or so before he can achieve another action. So that generally means the end of penetrative sex in that case, however, orgasm and ejaculation and man are two separate acts that generally occur at the same time unless you learn how to separate them. If you’ve been listening to this show for any length of time. You absolutely know this already, because I talk about it all the time. So if as a man you can learn to separate your orgasm from your ejaculation, then you would start to realize that you can have orgasms all along the way, especially if you’re doing you know sort of longer more tantric for lack of a better word, lovemaking, that type of lovemaking where you go for long periods of time, and you ride those waves of orgasmic bliss, both hers and yours.

So, if that’s the case, then having an orgasm certainly isn’t the end of sex for a man either. Right? So whether he’s using, you know, pans mouth toys, or he’s learned to separate his orgasm from ejaculation. Either way, orgasm does not mean the end of sex. And if you’re sitting there going, ooh, how do I separate my orgasm from my ejaculation? Well, you can either get in the power and mastery course because we teach that or you can sign up for coaching with me at KevinandCéline.com. So those are a couple of ways that you can learn how to do that if that is of interest to you. Okay, so I think I’ve thoroughly busted Myth number one, orgasm is certainly not the end of sex. And number two, ooh, this is a good one. This actually came from the same colleague. It is, it’s not good sex unless you have an orgasm. This is definitely one that you will hear.

Now, I would say that women tend to know this as a myth more so than men. Because a lot of women have had partners throughout their life that they didn’t really orgasm from, but they still enjoyed the sex enough that they would want to have sex on a regular basis. And then they would achieve their orgasm another way usually a vibrator or something like that. Another thing that’s really important to understand about, you know, female orgasm is that it is different it is, from one time you have sex to another from one moment during your lovemaking session to another, or her orgasm could be completely different. She might have clitoral orgasms, or G Spot orgasms, or cervical orgasms, they might be really powerful and feel explosive, they might be more implosive, they might be just small waves, or they might be huge climaxes. They can be all over the place. And so to say that it’s not good sex unless you have a specific type of orgasm just doesn’t make any sense. Okay, again, speaking of the women in this case, is easier because I think most people understand, at least to some extent, that women that can have a lot of variation in their orgasms and still consider it great sex, even if they didn’t have some giant explosive, you know, orgasm, slash climax.

But what about the guys? This is where you really hear this one. It’s like, guys will say if I didn’t ejaculate, that wasn’t good. And they’ll say that about anything, whether it’s receiving a blow job, a hand job, you know, intercourse itself, too many men focus on the destination, which is the ejaculation. And they think that it’s just not good. If they didn’t Jackie lay. That is absolutely not true. And if you’ve learned to have the kind of sex where you can go for long periods of time and ride multiple waves of orgasm, both hers and yours, you would know that that’s simply not true. I have had amazing many, many times amazing lovemaking sessions, or I never ejaculated, but I had multiple orgasms. And even if I didn’t, it was still great sex. It was still amazing. But you know, I mean, I’ve had lovemaking sessions where, you know, by the time I’m done, I feel that same sort of feeling as if I had a big ejaculatory orgasm, meaning I felt like I moved a ton of energy. And I was like, dizzy and like, who, you know, like, you all know, that feeling that I’m conveying. And yet, I never had an actual ejaculation.

So yeah, this idea that your sex as a man has to end in an ejaculation in order for it to be good, simply is not true. Now, of course, the title of this is, this particular one is it’s not good sex unless you have an orgasm. So part of the reframe here is that ejaculation and orgasm are two separate things. So but most, you know, average people would consider them to be the same thing. And that’s kind of why I’m talking a little bit more about from the man side thinking that you have to evacuate in order to have great sex in order to feel sexually satisfied. It’s just simply not true. If you learn to have the right kind of sex. And you know, it’s interesting, because some people aren’t really interested in having that kind of sex. They’re perfectly happy with their, you know, seven-minute ejaculatory sex. Okay, if that is you, and you’re listening to this and thinking, who cares? I mean, my seven-minute ejaculatory, sex is great. I would say, be open to the possibility that you could experience something a whole lot better, a whole lot more powerful. So however good you think your seven-minute ejaculatory sex is, I am asking you to keep an open mind that you may be able to experience something significantly more powerful.

All right, so that is Myth number two. Myth number three is an interesting one. This is what I got from searching the interwebs there. There is such a thing as a sexual peak. So there’s a bunch of sort of sub-myths associated with this particular myth. And they’re things like, men and women hit their sexual peak at different times. They’ll say that men reach their sexual peak in their later teenage years to early 20s. And women in their mid-30s. There are others too, but you get the idea that there’s a point in time in your life where you hit the pinnacle of all that sex can be and then it’s all downhill from there. And most people will put that sexual peak at a relatively young age. Now, I can tell you now that I am a very, very, very short distance away from 50 years old, I can tell you that this is just nonsense, complete nonsense. I can’t even begin to describe how much better sex is now than when I was in my 20s. And how much better at sex I am now than when I was in my 20s. To say that I hit my sexual peak in my 20s and it’s been downhill since then is ludicrous. And I know that this is true for many other people, too, I have talked to a lot of women in my age group who are, you know, in and around that menopause time of life. Some are post, some are in the middle of, and there are many of them will say the same thing, the sex just keeps getting better, and better.

So yeah, this idea that there’s this thing called the sexual peak, and that you hit it when you’re really young, and that your sex just isn’t ever going to be as good the rest of your life is nonsense. And I’ll tell you this if that has been your experience, that the best sex you were having was in your 20s or 30s. And it’s been downhill since then. It’s not because you hit a sexual peak. Right? It’s that it’s not you, it’s not because you’re the sexual peak. There’s something else happening. And that could be a lot of different things. And this is a lot of what I work with, with clients, when I’m coaching them is figuring out, okay, where have you sort of gotten off track when it comes to your sex life? And how do we get you back on track? There are lots of potential reasons for that. But it’s not because of any sort of sexual peak that’s timed and biological, and there’s nothing you can do about it. You know, sometimes people believe this one because they will equate it to peak hormone levels. And it is true that it let’s say, for instance, with men, you know, our testosterone peaks by age 30. And then it’s, it is actually a bit of a downhill ride from there. But how much downhill? And how fast downhill depend on a lot of factors that have to do with your health. And even still, my personal experience is that the quality of the sex that I have now, and I know at this age, my testosterone is not as high as it was when I was younger. And I’m not on TRT, or anything like that, as most of the men my age are these days, I can tell you that the quality of sex, and my desire for sex, my desire for sex is just as much as it was when I was younger.

The quality of sex that I have at this age is significantly better than when I was younger. So yeah, you can take the idea of a sexual peak and throw that one right out the window. Busted. All right, let’s move on to our next myth. Condoms make sex less enjoyable. This is an interesting one, I was actually having this conversation recently with somebody. And you know, I was just relating my personal experience with condoms. I’ve had periods in my life where I used condoms all the time and periods where I didn’t use them at all. And I would say that while you can feel a difference, if you’re really good at moving your sexual energy, and your partner is also really doesn’t make a difference. You can still have amazing, spectacular, super-powerful, highly energetic sex, even with a condom. And to back that up, there was actually a study done at Indiana University that found that people rate sex with condoms equally as pleasurable as sex without condoms. And that’s kind of why I wanted to include this one in the myths because I have personally heard men say that sex is not as good with condoms. And I have actually heard more often women saying that they are pressured into not using condoms, by men because the men claim that the sex just isn’t good for them with a condom on. That really isn’t true. It’s not true from my own personal experience and apparently according to Indiana University, their study says that that is not true as well. So there you go, don’t worry about sex being less pleasurable with using condoms.

Now, some men will actually use condoms to reduce the sensation in their penis so that they can last longer. And, you know, depending on what condoms you use, if you get some really big, thick, heavy ones, or a lot of times, you’ll hear guys say that they use to, okay, in that case, if you’re really making it thick, you might reduce some of the sensations. But in general, if you’re using, you know, modern condoms and you’re only using one of them, it should not have a significant impact at all. You know, sometimes men will claim that they’re not comfortable. That’s another big reason why they will say this. And if that’s the case, then find a condom that works for you. You know, something that sometimes guys claim that you know unless they have a Magnum, it’s just too uncomfortable. I don’t know. I’m obviously not one of those guys that has a penis that big, although, I mean, magnums work fine for me. But I don’t find non magnums to be uncomfortable. They’re tighter. Yeah. But I don’t find them to be uncomfortable to the point where they’re reducing the pleasure of sex. So I just think that’s nonsense unless maybe some guy is really large. Okay, sure. Maybe in that case, just find condoms that actually work for you and that actually fit. All right. Next, this is kind of a funny one. Race is a good indicator of penis size. Of course, you hear this all the time that certain ethnicities tend to have larger penises than others, you will hear this myth used or talked about frequently. I can tell you from my own personal experience, having spent many many years hanging around at nude beaches. And you know, obviously, as being a guy, you know, we spend a lot of time in locker rooms this and that. I know you’re not supposed to be looking, we try not to look because it’s just creepy, obviously.

But nevertheless, you ended up seeing a fair amount of penises. Of course, also, you know, Céline worked with a lot of men over many years as a sexollogical body worker, so I have her experience as well. And I can tell you that race is not a good indicator of penis size, that penis sizes are all over the board, regardless of what race you are in to back that up. There is a study from the quarterback clinic, Royal Hampshire Hospital, and St. James Hospital, that found a man’s physical endowment had absolutely nothing to do with his race, creed, or color. It has much more to do with the haphazard toss of the genetic dye, as they said, basically, what it means is, your genetics will determine that, but it has nothing to do with what your race is. So there you go. That one is actually one that you hear a lot. So it’s kind of fun to bust that sex myth.

Okay, so yeah, that one and this next one, even the condom one is kind of short, these are kind of like quick ones that are pretty easy to bust. And we’ll get into some deeper ones after the break. But the next one is, certain sex positions can prevent pregnancy. I put this one on here because you also sometimes hear that certain sex positions will increase the chances of pregnancy. And according to everything that I have read on this subject, the answer to that is Nope. So I don’t have an actual study to quote here, which I should have grabbed one of them. But anyway, basically, the research has shown that it doesn’t really increase or decrease it in either way that if you’re putting a penis into a vagina, and you are a jack elating, then basically the chances are about the same regardless of what position you’re in. So yeah, don’t think if you’re in a certain position, you either can or can’t do any better than another position. And you’ll, you’ll definitely hear this from people who have been trying to get pregnant and have been thus far unsuccessful. They’ll try certain positions, figuring it’ll somehow get deeper in there. And I would say you would be better off focusing your efforts on the timing.

So a lot of times we would think, just to have as much sex as you can, and just ejaculate inside her as often as you can. But remember, it takes a certain amount of time for sperm to develop in the testes. And so if you’re constantly ejaculating, the quality of the sperm coming out each time is going to be less and less than that you give yourself some time. So you want to give yourself some time, you also want to time it with her cycle, so that she is for sure in that fertile window. And then of course, also make sure that the health of both of you is really good. A lot of times this has far more to do with your health than anything else like position. So those would be areas if you’re trying to get pregnant or potentially prevent it, that would be far better to focus on than the position. And then of course, obviously, if you’re trying to prevent it, you would want to know where she is in her cycle, and you would want to make sure that you are using some sort of birth control method, preferably a reliable one. So yeah, sex positions do not prevent or increase the chances of pregnancy.

All right, next one. The only way to orgasm is via the clitoris. All right, here we go. This is the one that sparked actually this episode. So somebody did comment on one of my YouTube videos. And the comment was that the only way for a woman to orgasm is via the clitoris into focus on stimulating the clitoris. Now they were correct in so far as saying that the clitoris is much more than just a little bit you see sticking outside. If you’ve watched the episode that we did on this show the truth about the clitoris, I don’t remember what episode number that was. But we did sort of a deep dive into the clitoris. And we had a 3d model which we showed you what it actually looks like with the legs and the head and all of that. So they were correct in talking about that and the different ways that you can stimulate the clitoris. However, there is such a thing as a G Spot that is highly pleasurable. And for women who are really in touch with their bodies, they can feel the difference when they have a clitoral orgasm versus a G Spot Orgasm versus a cervical orgasm. So you know there are different places inside the vagina that can get highly stimulated and trigger an orgasm that isn’t necessarily clitoral.

So, yeah, don’t get sucked into the fact that the clitoris is the only way that a woman can have an orgasm. Women’s orgasms are very very they can be triggered by a lot of different things. And again, a woman who really knows her body and can feel the difference will tell you very clearly that orgasm did not come from my clit that came from my cervix or my G Spot Another interesting note I have found about that is that not every woman is really clear on was it a cervical was a big spot was it the most women will know the clitoral, but they’ll say why I didn’t really know I had an orgasm, but I’m not really sure what it was. It sometimes takes him a little while to be able to realize oh, oh, that was G spot I get it. Or that was you know, cervical. I would also say and this is just my personal opinion. So, ladies, you can correct me if I’m wrong. But it seems to me that it’s a little easier for women to tell the difference between say a clitoral and a cervical than it is a clitoral or a G spot. And I think this just depends on the women but I’m guessing it’s because physiologically the cervix and the clitoris are further apart. And so it’s just easier to tell that that’s where it originated from. I don’t know if that’s, I mean, it’s not true for all women. But I’ve heard that before that like oh, yeah, I know that was a cervical one. And then you say, Well, what do you have G Spot organ? I’m not really sure. Maybe I do you know. But in either case, the clitoris certainly is not the only way to trigger an orgasm.

Interestingly enough, you know, people who have saved been paralyzed and don’t feel don’t have any sensation from the waist down. They have been trained to orgasm from stimulation to other parts of the body that say, aren’t even related to the genitals. So you know, if that is true, which it actually is, you can go read the research on that. Obviously, the clitoris cannot be the only way to trigger an orgasm. All right. So there you go. That’s The first seven Myths Busted going to take a short break and then we’ll come back with some more.

Hey, guys, you know what makes a man great, you know, the kind of masculine man that women are irresistibly attracted to? And one Is it money, job title, his physical body being great in bed, a big penis, great pickup lines or something else. What if you don’t have those or only some of them? What if you’ve had a string of failed relationships are embarrassed by your bedroom skills, doubt whether you can rise to the occasion, worry about lasting long enough, or are always stuck in the friend zone, I can help you if you’re ready to make big changes and finally become the man you have always wanted to be, then this is the program for you to find out more, please go to KevinandCéline.com/go/warrior. That is KevinandCéline.com/go/warrior. Of course, that is my men’s sexual mastery coaching program. And it is I personally think it’s fantastic. The ability to really work one on one with men and really figure out what’s going on with them and dial in the practices, the techniques, the confidence that they themselves specifically need is super powerful. And you know, anybody that’s been through that program already knows that. And if you haven’t been and you’re needing help and support in any of these areas, please go to KevinandCéline.com/go/warrior. All right.

Next myth. I can’t believe we didn’t cover this next one. In the first episode, we did but I went through and made sure that all of the mess I’m talking about today were not covered in the original episode. And this one was not there. So which I find weird. Anyway, the myth is that masturbation is bad for you. I’m sure you all heard this when you were younger. You heard it would cause blindness, hairy palms, impotence later in life, erectile dysfunction, penis shrinkage, penis, curvature, low sperm count infertility, mental illness, and physical weakness. You’ve heard it all, all of the terrible things that would happen to you if you dared to touch your genitals on your own. Obviously, none of that is true. Interestingly enough, most people figured out relatively young in life, it wasn’t going to cause blindness or hairy palms because they had been masturbating quite a bit. And they weren’t blind and they didn’t have any hair on their palms. But they were probably still somewhat concerned about things like impotence, erectile dysfunction, penis curvature, that sort of thing.

You don’t have to worry about that it absolutely will not cause evidence of erectile dysfunction, or curvature unless you physically damage your penis through really rough masturbation. So I have to put that caveat in there. Because I am absolutely amazed sometimes at how rough men are with their penises and you don’t see this with women, you don’t see women getting super rough with their clitoris. Or with using say, internal stimulation. Just women seem to be gentle on their genitals. And so many men are like, I don’t know what they’re doing. But I know that one of the things that Céline used to do, was masturbation coaching, where she would literally, you know, get on a Zoom call with a guy and teach him how to masturbate properly. Obviously, they had identified that something was not working for them. And part of that was okay, let me see what you do, like, show me what a typical masturbation session for you looks like. And I just remember hearing some of the stories from her. She’s just like, I can’t even believe what some of these guys are doing to their penis. So, first of all, if you’re doing something like that really rough, stop it, there’s no need for that at all. And second of all, that could potentially cause some damage to the physical structure of the penis, and could potentially cause things like peroneus disease, which is the curvature of the penis. You could potentially have some erectile dysfunction if you damage the vessels that, you know, fill the penis up with blood, so don’t do any of that.

But normal healthy masturbation will not cause any of those issues. I do want to say that the physical weakness one which was the last one I read there On the list, is only true if you masturbate a lot if you ejaculate every time, and if you do not take the time to build up the energy in your masturbation practice. So, you know, the Daoists have a whole chart about how many times you should evacuate. And it’s by age and the older you get, the less, you should evacuate according to Dallas teachings, they have that because they say that ejaculation depletes you of energy. And it does to a certain extent, this is why you know, you have that other sort of myth about once the guy ejaculates. All he wants to do is roll over and go to sleep well because he does feel energetically depleted if he hasn’t taken the time to build up the energy. So if you’re having that five to seven-minute sex that always ends and isn’t Jack Ulation, then yes, you probably do feel depleted from that and want to go to sleep. But if you’ve learned to last a lot longer than that, you can build up a tremendous amount of energy throughout your entire body, that even when you do ejaculate, you don’t feel that sense of depletion so that physical weakness is no longer an issue that doesn’t matter if it’s masturbating, or if it’s making love with an actual partner.

As long as you’re taking the time to build up the energy, you won’t experience physical weakness. And I just want to point out also that not only are the, you know, the sort of downsides of masturbation not true, there are actually positives, things that are good from masturbating. So one of the things they say is, there’s no such thing as too much, that is largely true unless you are excessively ejaculating and depleting yourself. Or it’s somehow getting in the way of your getting your life done with your work with your sex life with other people. So if it’s interfering in a negative way, with anything like that, then obviously there is such a thing as too much. But as long as it is not interfering, then technically, there’s no such thing as too much in a sense, it’s not going to, it’s not going to harm you physically in any way. But there are some benefits like stress reduction, the release of tension, enhanced sleep quality, boosts concentration elevates mood relieves menstrual cramps, alleviates pain, and improves sex. So those are all things that can potentially happen with a healthy use of masturbation, like anything in life, right? There is a healthy use of it and an unhealthy use. You could use water in a healthy way, meaning that you’re drinking enough water every day to not be dehydrated. But you could be so focused on making sure that you’re drinking enough that you drink too much water which could actually deplete your body of necessary minerals, minerals, and nutrients that you need.

So like anything, you can use it appropriately, or you can use it inappropriately and as long as masturbation is used appropriately, it is certainly not bad for you and actually does have benefits. I can’t believe we didn’t include the masturbation myth in the first episode, I guess probably just we had so many already that we didn’t have time for anymore. Okay, number nine, this is one that is a personal sort of pet peeve of mine. And I still have people arguing with me on this all the time. What is number nine? There is such a thing as blue balls. You hear guys say this all the time. Man, if you don’t finish me off, I’m gonna get blue balls. Still, it’s 2023. And there are still men out there saying, if you don’t finish me off, I’m gonna get blue balls. This is ridiculous. Blue balls do not exist. Now, they don’t exist for a very obvious reason, which is that your balls do not turn blue. Just because you got really turned on and you didn’t Jackie lay. It doesn’t happen. Now I understand what men are talking about when they are describing blue balls and they’ll describe the sort of a painful feeling. But the reality is this. What that is is a buildup of sexual energy only in your genital area. These are people that haven’t learned to move that sexual energy throughout their bodies. And so the energy builds up down in the genitals so much that they either feel discomfort or they have to release it. And that is really what they are calling blue balls. But blue balls don’t really exist. Your balls aren’t going to turn blue and As long as you learn how to move energy, you’re not going to have any discomfort down there, either. So there you go.

Feel free to argue with me in the comments if you want. I know somebody will. But I’m telling you, as somebody who has had a lot of sex without ejaculating, who has had hours-long sex, Celine and I have talked about this on the show, I think our record was somewhere around five or six hours straight of penetrative sex. didn’t get any blue balls, and didn’t ejaculate. So yeah. But I can remember being very, very young and feeling that discomfort because I hadn’t yet learned how to move energy. So there you go, no such thing as blue balls. So get over it, stop using that as an excuse. All right, next one on the list. After a certain age, sex is no longer important. This is interesting. Because you hear this a lot. We did a variation of this in the previous episode, which was the myth that older people don’t have as much sex. And we had some stats in there too, that that bust that myth, pretty good. Older people are still having plenty of sex, doesn’t mean they all are, you know, but they certainly could be if they wanted to be if they could get all the other stuff out of the way, the mental stuff, the, the, you know, resentment towards their partner the health problems, if they could get all that stuff out of the way, they could be having just as much sex as people who are significantly younger than them.

So while some people believe that a decrease in libido is a natural part of aging, a loss of sexual desire can be related to a number of other factors, including hormone deficiencies, depression, anxiety disorders, side effects of medications, changes to a relationship, communication barriers or loss of spouse or partner. Basically, there’s a whole bunch of stuff that can get in the way, which I just talked about. But if you remove those things, then it doesn’t really matter what age you are, you can be having plenty of sex. One of the cool things about doing what I do for a living is I get to talk to a lot of people. And we’ve had quite a few older people who work in this field, who are either couples, or when they’re generally couples, but not always, who talk about the fact that they have really fantastic, abundant sex lives. And they’re in their 60s and 70s. I had a neighbor actually, who was in his 80s, who still had an abundant sex life, he was absolutely hysterical. And he used to tell us about it all the time. I think he used to like to try to make Céline blush, which of course, never happened, because I can’t imagine what you could think of in the realm of sexuality that actually would have made Céline blush.

But he used to enjoy telling us stories about his sexcapades I think it was around 85 at the time. So yeah, I mean, sex is just as important, regardless of your age, how old you are. And really, what tends to get in the way is life, you know, other life stuff. So it’s not so much the fact that we are certain chronological age. It’s more that as we get older, we let more life things get in the way. But if we get those things out of the way, we can still have a wonderful and fulfilling, and abundant sex life. All right. Number 11. Viagra and oral medications can treat erectile dysfunction. All right, I have to admit, there are two reasons why I put this one on the list. Number one, it is a little bit of a pet peeve of mine. And number two, it’s because this is one of the things I teach. So to be completely transparent about that, but okay, why is it a pet peeve of mine? Because I’ve heard a significant number of men saying that, why do I need to do the work when I can just take a pill? To which of course I always respond, taking a pill does not solve the underlying problem. It’s just a quick fix and a temporary fix by the way. And so my recommendation always is, hey, you should really work on solving the underlying problem. One because that’s going to help you in a lot of other ways, and two, they won’t be relying on medication anymore.

So that’s kind of why it it’s a pet peeve of mine is because I do hear men talking about the fact that all they have to do well whatever you know, I can’t achieve an erection so all I got to do is just get the pill. No, there are cases and scenarios and situations. is where that might be the right fit. And a lot of the time, it’s not the right fit. Maybe it’s something you use interim while you’re working on solving the underlying problem. But it’s not something that you should just go, oh, well, that’s the solution, I’m just going to stick with that for the rest of my life. So the other reason why I put this on the list is that teaching men how to achieve erections naturally without the need for things like pills or pumps, or other various techniques is one of the things that we teach you in Power Up Your Erections, which is part of the Power and Mastery series. So you can either purchase Power Up Your Erections by itself as just a standalone course. Or if you purchase the full Sexual Mastery program, it comes with both Power Up Your Erections and Master Your Ejaculation. And as you heard at the beginning of the show, we are on version 3.0, which is the best version to date, it just keeps getting better.

So yeah, I mean, full disclosure, I put this on the list because it is a myth, it is something I hear it is something that sort of irritates me every time I hear it, because I know it’s not true. And I have solutions for you. And those solutions are at power master.com, or at Kevin and zillion.com. So go check those out, just keep in mind that these things do not treat the underlying condition, they only temporarily alleviate the symptom. That’s the best way to put it. Okay, one more sex myth to bust on this episode. And that is great sex will just happen naturally. I had to put this on the list. I saw this written on the internet. I didn’t even read whatever their explanation was on it, because it means something to me very specifically. And it just was, it just prompted me to want to talk about this. So great sex doesn’t just happen naturally. I can’t tell you how many times in response to telling couples, you need to schedule a date night, the response that I get back or something that I used to get back was, oh, I don’t want to do that. It ruins the spontaneity and it’s just it’s not as fun and blah, blah, blah. And I say, okay, so you want it to be spontaneous? How’s that working out for you? How frequently have you had sex? Why are you here working with me if this is such a great strategy for you? The reality is, is great six doesn’t just happen for a couple of reasons. In that particular case, as I was just discussing, you have to make it a priority. And you have to make sure that you set aside time, especially with the busy lives that everybody has these days. So just kind of winging it and expecting that spontaneously, at some point, you guys are going to end up having sex and it’s going to be fantastic. Sure it could happen.

But the chances are significantly lower, significantly lower than if you actually said hey, why don’t we have a date night every week on this day, this time? Or even if you just say the beginning of the week, okay, this week, date night, it’s Wednesday night, at such and such a time, we’re going to set aside time, we’re going to make sure we have no distractions, we got somebody to watch the kids, we got all the works that like whatever you got to get out of the way you get it out of the way. The other thing and this is the main reason why I wanted to talk about this one is that we often treat sex, the same way we do with say, walking or breathing. Well, what do I mean by that? Well, what I mean is, we take them for granted, because you know, we’re born and we just do those things, well, maybe not walking, but breathing, right, and then eventually walking and then eventually, you know, becoming sexual. The idea is that they’re just basic parts of what it means to be human. And so therefore, we tend to take them for granted, meaning we think we know how to do them because it’s just part of being human. And the reality is, is that we don’t know how to do them very well. Just go people watch a little bit and just go to a public place and sit down and watch people walk around and see the way that people carry their bodies. If you’ve ever done anything like personal training or any sort of, you know, work in the posture slash chiropractic industry or anything like that you understand what good posture is and how to not hurt your body. You’re appalled at what you see as people walk around you what are these people doing?

Same thing with breathing. Most people really don’t know how to breathe correctly. They Breathe super shallow, they breathe only up here in the upper chest not down from the diaphragm where they should be breathing. What but they were born knowing how to breathe, how come they don’t breathe, right? Because they were never taught properly. When the same thing goes for sex. We think we know how to do sex because that’s just part of being human. We know how to do the basic act, we know how to take a penis and put it in a vagina and make babies. Yeah, pretty much everybody knows how to do that. But most people don’t know how to have really great sex. They haven’t learned the techniques. They don’t know that orgasm and ejaculation are two different things. They don’t know how to be able to control their ejaculation. Women don’t know how to really let go and just totally open up and receive in the fullest way that they can receive. Sometimes women don’t know that they can have more than just a clitoral orgasm. And this is so many things that people don’t know about sex. Hence, I’m at episode 263 of this show. Because there is actually a lot to know about it just like anything else. And if you haven’t taken the time to study it and learn it, then you probably don’t know it.

So if you don’t know how to make sex, great, what do you think the chances are, that you’re going to have great sex? And furthermore, I would say this,, even if you haven’t taken the time to study it, and you’re like, yo, yo, my sex life is pretty good. I’d say that I have great sex, I would say if you haven’t really taken the time to really look at what’s out there in the realm of sexuality, the possibilities out there, then you’re probably shortchanging yourself and whatever you think great sex is, it could probably be a whole lot better. In fact, I did an episode of this show just a few episodes back called This Is What Sex Could Be, Are You Missing Out? Go listen to that if you want to understand what is truly possible in the realm of sexuality. That kind of sex doesn’t just happen naturally, you need to learn a few things, and you need to practice. So go check that episode out as well. All right, that was number 12. The last one I had on this list. If anybody has other myths that they want busted, drop them in the comments, I would love to hear them. I know there are a lot more out there.

As I stated at the beginning of this show, I deliberately didn’t talk about some of the ones that I find to be more ridiculous and just plain silly and not worth talking about. But I’m sure that there are some others out there. So we’d love to hear them in the comments. Tell me what your six myths is, or at least one that you’ve heard. And I maybe if there’s enough of them, maybe I’ll do another episode on that. Or maybe I’ll just answer you in the comments. I do appreciate when people comment on the videos and tell me their own experiences and their own stories. So that’s really great. The only thing I ask in the comments is that you please at least be respectful. If you are mean or hateful or derogatory in any way you will get deleted and probably banned from the channel. It’s okay if you have a different opinion than me, but just be kind about it. All right, everybody. That’s all I have for this episode. And I will see you next week.

We hope you liked this episode of the Love Lab podcast. If you enjoy this show, subscribe. Leave us a review and share it with your friends.

Céline Remy 53:42
And for more free exclusive content. Join us in the passion vault at kevinanthonycoaching.com/vault. That’s kevinanthonycoaching.com/vault.

Kevin Anthony 53:55
Thanks for listening.

Céline Remy 53:57
And remember, you’re amazing!