Kevin Anthony 0:05
Welcome to the Love Lab podcast, the place to be for honest and real talk about relationships and sex, whether you’re a man or a woman, single or a couple, this is the show for you. I am your host, Kevin Anthony, and I am here to help you have the relationship of your dreams and the best sex of your life.

Alright, welcome back to the Love Lab podcast. This is episode 339 and it is titled, the realities of having a large penis, a conversation with the man with the world’s largest penis. So one of the things that I see in my practice a lot is men who stress over the fact that they think their penis is too small, and they all wish that they had much larger penises than they actually do. But interestingly enough, because I coach both men and women, I tend to hear from the women, and the women are telling me that they don’t necessarily need a particularly large penis and many of them will actually say that if it’s too big, it’s potentially a problem for them. I also have had clients in the past who did have very large penises and struggled with how to use them, to say, not hurt their partner, or to make sex more enjoyable, because there are some things that maybe you can or can’t do if there’s a big mismatch in size.

And so that’s what we want to talk about today. And we’re going to talk about it with my guest, who is the world record holder for the largest penis, and we’re just going to have a conversation about his life and the realities of it, what works for him and what doesn’t work for him, and what he’s learned, and any advice he might have for people who are dealing with similar situations. So that’s what we’re going to talk about on today’s show.

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Okay. My guest today is Matt Barr, and he is known for holding the title of the man with the world’s largest penis, a distinction that has been medically confirmed. His story gained public attention through the channel four documentary my massive cock, and a guest appearance on the UK this morning, where he candidly discussed the personal and social challenges that come with his extraordinary size. I’m going to leave out the part of the bio that says what the size is, because we’re going to talk about that in a moment. Welcome to the show Matt.

Matt Barr 3:13
Hello. How’s it going?

Kevin Anthony 3:15
Good. So I want to start by just talking a little bit about your background. So first of all, everyone wants to know how large is your penis. We got to just get that out of the way right from the start.

Matt Barr 3:28
I mean, well, first off, obviously there’s some variation in it. It’s not like it’s always the same thing, like most fish, when someone says, I’m excised. Because realistically, you know, certainly the bigger you get, there’s more fluctuation in size, so on, you know, basically over 14, nearly 14 and a half on a good day, on a bad day, more like over 12, maybe. But there’s in that kind of range, and that’s obviously wrecked soft, maybe more 10 and a half, typically, again, lot of fluctuation around that. And then go through about eight and a half depending on the exact levels of arousal.

Kevin Anthony 4:04
I think is one of the things that’s interesting about that is, you know, you know, roughly 14-ish erect. You know, 12-ish, 12 and a half-ish facet, right? So, what I think is interesting about that is, a lot of times when guys will see another man who has a really large penis when, and you know, like, let’s say they’re at a nude beach, or they’re in the locker room, or wherever they are, and they see a man that has a really large penis, they go, Oh, my God, if it’s that big when it’s soft, it must be enormous when it’s huge. And you know, one of the things that I recognize from the numbers that you’ve given here is that it doesn’t actually get that much bigger.

Matt Barr 4:47
It doesn’t like, yeah, so people just think, oh, it’s gonna double or something like, no, no. That would be ridiculous, impossible. But I think you could fall through the street, you pass out instantly, get light-headed, but that would be medically impossible. No, I think it’s still i. Like some growth, but it’s certainly not. Again, it’s more of a shower than a grower. Certainly, I think if people are comparing like for like, it’s very different. Although, of course, there are some men who part of the reason they would like to have a large one, it’s for that reaction they what they’d rather, in some ways, be bigger soft than they care about being bigger hard. That makes sense. Yeah, other men’s reactions.

Kevin Anthony 5:20
Believe it or not, you’re absolutely correct about that, because I have had a really prominent urologist who specializes in male enhancement on the show, and we talked extensively about all the different methods for making a man’s penis larger, and a lot of them do not actually increase the size when it’s erect. They only make it appear bigger when it’s soft. And so we had that unica and all that stuff exactly, yeah, there’s like, why? So my question to him at the time was, why would you do it if it doesn’t make it bigger when it’s hard? And his answer was exactly what you just said, it’s just because they’d rather be a shower. But you know, I really want to make the point for, you know, men who are listening to this, you know, like the average man, you know, we know that the average size of a male penis is about five inches, right? And so when it’s when it’s, you know, soft, it’s probably half that, right? So it probably does about double in size, exactly. And I just want people, you know, men who might have penises on the smaller size, to understand that if you see a man that has a particularly large flaccid penis, it doesn’t mean that it’s going to be double that size, right? So I just, I kind of want men to feel a little bit more okay about that.

Matt Barr 6:33
And even if it does, I don’t think, well, like, again, people get that idea of, like, wouldn’t be great if I had this instrument and all the reactions you get people think about it from those very specific moments where it’s going to be really positive, like the locker rooms or something, or to impress somewhere, I don’t know, in a romantic situation, perhaps just to get that shock factor. They don’t think about what it’s like the rest of the time. You know, when you’re going to work or on a commute or something, it’s just these things where it’s just, it’s not positive to have anything you kind of want to be more the fact that the average piece is, you know, half a size and gets bigger, that’s much more ideal, typically, than it being big all the time and then a bit bigger erect.

Kevin Anthony 7:11
I completely agree. We’re going to talk about some of the realities of where it’s not so convenient in a moment. One other thing that I want to cover just before we get into that is, how was it discovered that you had the world’s, how do you end up holding the title for the world’s largest penis?

Matt Barr 7:30
Well, I mean, yeah, you have to give it a bit of a caveat in terms of that, because obviously, there’s 4 billion on the planet. They’re normally measured, so there can easily be someone out there who’s bigger. So the caveat is, it’s the largest one that’s been medically verified by urological tests, so there’s actually been people to examine it by an independent study. So that’s, it’s bigger than any of those the previous record, I think, was 10.6 or something like that. They’d been actually logged anywhere as part of a study. So it’s bigger than standard. It’s not to say, you know, there could be a whole tribe of people out there who somehow are bigger. But again, it’s just based on what’s normal. And again, it’s just so outside the norm that it’s, it’s, it’s basically Well, spoken to the lawyers about this for the book, and they said, Oh, given all the evidence on your side, it makes sense, you can call your book that, and you can have that title. It’s fine until proven otherwise, I suppose.

Kevin Anthony 8:21
But like, you know, was there an ad in a journal we’re looking for the man, you know, guys with large penises? Like, how did you end up getting it officially measured?

Matt Barr 8:30
Yeah, it was for the documentary that I was basically, and I wasn’t going to do the show originally, and I was always very cautious about it. So on the show, I was, what I said, just give me my flatter size, not my direct size. Said, you know, when you show it, just show me, because there’s a scene where I leave a very cold body of water. So I had to, kind of, again, give more of a like. That’s not a, what’s the word fluff, size or not A? It was very easy to give like, because a lot of the man on the show were only fine promoters, so they had a very different angle. I think so. I think the reason I wanted to take part was to try and give my point of view, which is a bit different than that point of view.

I spoke to them about it, obviously, I said, Oh, you don’t want to go on the show, blah, blah, blah, but eventually they sort of taught me around to doing it, and then it’s all kind of come from there. I’ve got a lot of positive feedback from people, so I want to hear more of your story. Obviously, the documentary has got its own angle as well. So to give it my take on it, and everything’s happened since, you know, it’s been quite quite a whirlwind journey. So basically, that’s been an opportunity to be more open about it, and it’s had, uh, thankfully, had mostly positive, uh, outcome.

Kevin Anthony 9:32
Okay, that makes more sense now. I understand how you end up getting that title.

Matt Barr 9:39
Just to clarify. So it’s not a Guinness record, because no one’s a Guinness record holder. Again, Guinness is very much. You got to pay them a lot by you to even get seen. So it’s like 20 grand. They don’t even do this record anyway, but some of the other ones do, like the World Record Academy, like 15 grand just to get seen. So it’s a bit like a bit much for me.

Kevin Anthony 9:57
Yeah, and what does that really get you anyway, right?

Matt Barr 10:01
Exactly people will say it when they see it.

Kevin Anthony 10:06
Well, you know, one of the things that I do appreciate about you, Matt is that I haven’t seen the documentary, but I know that when we talked about, you know, what we were going to talk about on this show, you were very open about it and wanting to share your story in the hopes that it could help people. And I know that at the end, what you’re going to be promoting is also something that is around helping people. So I think that’s admirable, that you’re willing to be that public about it. And it’s not just about Look at me, I have a giant penis. It’s more about how can we use this to help people. So I appreciate that.

Matt Barr 10:40
I mean, there are just so many myths around in pornography and any fans, especially now, a lot of people could just, you know, do what they want to spread rumors and just it can be like a marketing tool or something more than it is an actual biological reality. So I think trying to come from the point of view, of someone who’s not trying to do a first trap, and they’re just trying to be honest about the issues that you get with it is, is a different angle. It’s something that’s worth, worth exploring.

Kevin Anthony 11:05
That’s really what I wanted to talk about today. The bulk of it is the issues associated with it. So let’s just get into it. I mean, from your personal experience, what have been some of the challenges that you’ve had in your own life? And you can talk about just life, you know, you mentioned, you know, on a long trip somewhere, you know, and then also in your relationships and sex life.

Matt Barr 11:26
Yeah, they’re two very different kinds of angles there. But I think the main difference, or the biggest difference, I think, is that sense of your own skin to people, you know, often people will say, Oh, what are you complaining about for being but anytime you’re noticeably different then, and there’s no one quite like you at least, or very few people quite like me, no one that you know at least the or even know half really, it becomes more challenging, and your sense of self is is different because you aren’t part of the norm. So when it becomes part of your identity as well, people just think that’s kind of who you are.

So I’ve always not wanted to talk about this publicly until kind of now, because I’m secure enough for myself to be at that point where I could say, okay, just who I am. They’ll take a leave that. Well, it’s not going to define me just because you think this about me, whereas, again, when you’re younger, impressionable, and that’s, you know, everyone knows you’re the big dick guy, then you kind of it can be very, very have a different impact on your self, see, and it becomes like, is that, if you do meet someone, is that why they’re interested in you, etc, etc, so you do kind of lose that kind of confidence. I suppose in some ways, people always think, oh, it’s going to be, you know, big dick means big confidence. But it’s not because you have that psychological issue with it, and then obviously the practical issues we’ll get into.

Kevin Anthony 12:47
So it sounds to me, well, two things there that I heard you say, you know, one of them is something that a lot of times women feel also like, you know when women are very beautiful and they’re very voluptuous, maybe they have big breasts and they feel like people only see them for their boobs, or for, you know, their bodies in general, or their looks, right? And they feel like, but there’s more to me than just that, right? And so I hear that you’re kind of saying the same thing. Like, when everybody knows you’re the guy with the big dick, they’re like, Oh, he’s just the big dick guy, right? And you’re like, Well, wait a minute. Hold on, there’s a whole person here, right?

Matt Barr 13:20
Yeah, I think it’s even worse. The same with, like, someone who’s very rich, if you being used for the wealth, but I think it’s it’s worse because you don’t have the same benefits. Like, obviously, wealth comes with it huge amounts of benefits. And, like, beauty, it’s something that kind of, you look at someone’s face and you know it instantly, whereas, obviously, my case, you know, I mean, you can see a bunch. But other than that, it’s not like, something that is going to improve your life on a day-to-day basis, in the same way the other things have more of an obvious uplift. It’s something like it has some benefits, and it’s not, you know, a university good thing, should we say? Even with the drawbacks, there are so many problems that come with it, such as certain people who do think it is, you know, because they seem too poor, and they think that’s the ideal, right?

Kevin Anthony 14:03
Well, and you know, I mean, obviously regular porn movies for sure, perpetuate like me. This is something I tell people all the time. It’s like, do not judge yourself based on what you see in porn movies, because they always, of course, pick men with above-average size penises. But, even it’s really funny. This was not planned at all, by the way, but I had mentioned yesterday to my girlfriend that I’d never seen the movie Boogie Nights. So last night, we actually watched that movie. And for listeners, if you’ve never seen the movie, you’re not familiar with it. It is a movie about a young man who has a very large penis and gets into the porn industry, supposedly very loosely based on John Holmes’s life.

I think so I had never seen it before, and we’re watching the movie, and that, that thing that you mentioned is, every time somebody in the movie sees it, they show the expression on their face, right? This is like, oh my god, kind of a look. I. On their face. Of course, I also had to, I had to make the comment to my girlfriend. I said it’s so weird that we decided to watch this movie tonight. Because did you know I’m actually interviewing the man with the world’s largest penis tomorrow morning?

Matt Barr 15:14
Yeah, and it came out where it was great, yeah, I think it was like 98, wasn’t it? So remember when I was like, a teenager, yeah, somewhere.

Kevin Anthony 15:21
Around there, ’97 or ’98ish, something like that. But okay, let’s talk about some of the potential challenges just in day-to-day life with having a penis that big,

Matt Barr 15:35
I think, I mean, so there are, it’s more a case of, there are complications, as opposed to, I don’t, I think the challenge is too much, in the sense of, you know, it’s not that you stop you from doing things. It’s not too much, but you have to be very careful with what you’re doing. Gotta be very cautious with your things. That you can’t just choose an outfit based on what you think looks good. You’ve got to kind of choose something that’s very baggy and has appropriate room, or other things, which you can say, oh, everyone has to do everyone’s dress to match their body type, which is true.

But of course, there are very few angles of clothing. They’re designed for men like me, basically, whereas even larger men physically, whatever reason or obesity or muscles or whatever, there is clothing designed to kind of scale up naturally. But there’s not something that’s based on proportionality. So you do have that issue of trying to find things that fit. And yeah, if you aren’t careful, then you can kind of give people an eye full. So it’s very much a case of trying to be respectful of that.

And then obviously the other issues, if you’re not, or if people do see it, or even if you’ve done your best to cover it up, sometimes you know, you might just move in a certain way, and it’s more obvious. And then you deal with the we prepare, deal with the repercuss to that, I thought, you kind of hide it anyway. It’s not like impossible to hide anywhere you can, like, wear, you know, a mumu or something, and then it’s completely unavoidable. But, you know, it’s just so reputation that kind of forced me around as well.

Kevin Anthony 16:57
You know, that’s very interesting, because I’m just, I’m thinking about my own experience, right, as a man, and you know what it’s like with clothes and uncomfortable situations and things like that? And I’m thinking, Man, I’m literally, uh, erect, about almost exactly half your size. I’m just like, I’ve already not got enough space in the clothes. You know, you wear a nice like, you know, you want to put on a nice pair of underwear for your woman, and you get a little bit turned on, and you’re already sticking out of it, right?

Matt Barr 17:31
Imagine that must be, yeah, the teenage years, where there are a lot more hormones going around as well, and you’re getting more semi-rounds or something particularly difficult. Obviously, my age now it’s less of an issue, but you’re younger, certainly, those hormones are flowing and then.

Kevin Anthony 17:45
The other thing that I think is really ironic is that there is a whole subsection of men, and they make all kinds of things to literally stuff your pants, to make it stick out like that. Yeah. This is, this is funny. This goes way back. This goes back, like, 20 years, I think, but a friend of mine and myself, we were getting really into martial arts, and we were studying Muay Thai, and we were total beginners, like, we didn’t know what we were doing, and so we were trying to figure out, like, what equipment we needed, and our coach told us we needed to go get cups right to protect ourselves, and we didn’t know what to get.

And so, like, we’re on this is somewhat early days of the Internet, right? Because it was 20 years, 20 ish years ago, maybe a little more. Anyway, we’re on there trying to figure out, like, what we need. And all I kept coming across was information online from men talking about this from the point of view of which one makes their bulge look bigger in their I’m like, This is not helping me.

Matt Barr 18:45
Yeah, please spinal tap. I know how the cucumber in the pants exactly,

Kevin Anthony 18:50
But it’s just amazing to me that you have, you have a segment of the population of men who are intentionally trying to make it look bigger and stick out in their pants, and then you have another section who are intentionally trying to hide it because they don’t want it to be sticking out.

Matt Barr 19:05
I think there’s a, you know, you know, an epidemic amongst men, and kind of, there’s always the issue is, sort of, with women, they get too much attention, and often bad attention. But it’s not hard to get attention, right? So men, it’s very much, you know, men just kind of go out there. They often don’t get, you know, any affection to in some cases. And so anything they can do to kind of stand out or get any kind of looks or whatever, yeah, I be what they do.

So even if it’s negative attention like that, because obviously, if they knew women, they’d know that generally, you know, for the majority of them, it’s not, they’re not going to be excited by that, you know, maybe they like the man, they might go ooh. Or if it’s particularly huge, and I think it’s cute, be curious. But for the average thing, you know, it’s not going to be, they’re not going to go, wow, and then suddenly fall in love with you, especially if it’s, you know, a fake cup or something right?

Kevin Anthony 19:48
Well, that’s the thing that I always thought was funny. It’s the same thing I think about, you know, women who wear bras that are super padded to make their boobs a lot bigger. It’s like, at some point that bra is going to come off, right? At some point those. Are going to come down and somebody’s gonna go, Wait a minute. That’s not as big as that bulge that you had. Everybody said that, yeah, that’s a whole other, a whole other conversation. Are there any other sort of realities, like, things like, like, I think about like sports, maybe sports might be difficult, right? Like, or any other things that you know might be difficult.

Matt Barr 20:21
I mean, I’m kind of well, fortunate, unfortunately, I’ve never been particularly sporty, so it’s not an issue. But again, it’s sort of stuff, like going to the gym, that’s where you have to be very, very cautious about what you’re wearing, especially, or do it like go. I used to go, like, really early in the morning, when I used to go more regularly to just to avoid getting too much attention, because again, so much you can kind of, especially for the treadmill or something. So even with like, compression pants and stuff like that to try and hide it, you still sometimes have some kind of a mark or, like, cover it with a towel and get the treadmill and do your thing. But I’ve got to the point now where I’ve got my own little home gym to use. I don’t have to go out as much, but, yeah, obviously, if I was about to, you know, doing football or whatever regularly, then it would be a problem. I know it’s actually part of why I’ve never been there into it, but it’s combination of personality and and attributes meant they were never something I really enjoyed.

Kevin Anthony 21:18
Okay, so, I mean, I’m sure people are mildly curious about what it’s like to walk around with a penis that large, but what I really want to get into is more how it affects you and your relationships and your sex life. So let’s talk about that.

Matt Barr 21:33
On that point, though, if you wanted to do it, if you wanted to know, it was like they could walk around with a huge, huge, huge bulge. They could try it for a day, and you’d see, you wouldn’t get there. Actually, you want to, you know, people need to think why you get think, why are you gonna get this amazing reaction? I think, number one, you’d be very self-conscious. And number two, you know, you don’t get like they’re not able to turn their head and go, Wow, take this out. It’s gonna be, you know, yeah, most people stay going, what are you doing? Why? Why are you showing off like that? It’s weird. Yeah, it’s interesting.

Kevin Anthony 21:57
I have a really good friend, this really amazing guy. He’s a former Chippendales dancer, and he’s quite large himself, but he always goes out of his way to cover it, hide it, to you know, it’s not that he’s ashamed of it in any way, but he just, he’s, he’s actually really, like you said, he’s just really aware of the impact it can have.

Matt Barr 22:20
And, yeah, there’s a time and a place for it. Like in a strip club, it’s different. I’ve done trip shows and stuff. But, you know, with situations of various clubs where, you know, you do wear something, where it is, flaunting it and then, but on the day-to-day basis, you know, 9.99% of the time, you kind of want to cover it up and just look as normal as possible.

Kevin Anthony 22:35
Exactly. Yeah, that’s, that’s been his experience as well. Yeah. So let’s talk about relationships with women. So how has this impacted your dating life?

Matt Barr 22:53
Well, I mean, depends on how you want to look at it. In some ways, obviously, it’s given me a lot more attention. I’ve got more action to look at that than I would have had otherwise. But it’s also made things more challenging. I had to, like, learn how to be good at sex in a way that I could have probably been coasting a bit on mediocre sex if I had a normal anatomy. Because I was just like, do what you, what you kind of told in terms of what you learn, you pick it up, and it’s all like, okay, there’s no risk of injury, there’s no work required, really, just the stuff you kind of doing. Don’t think about it very much.

But in my case, obviously, so it’s always front of mind. It’s always been such a major issue in any race you’ve ever had, whether it’s, you know, a one-night stand or a long-term thing, it’s always, it’s always there as a factor. So yeah, it’s just kind of taught me to appreciate it more, and again, both the impact it has and again, that you know you can have good sex without using the penis at all.

Kevin Anthony 23:51
Yeah. So let’s say you’re, you’re dating, and there’s a woman that you’re potentially interested in. At what point do you say, um, by the way, there’s something you should know. And how does that go?

Matt Barr 24:04
Yeah, well, it’s interesting. Once, like, when I was younger, my reputation kind of followed me around, and then mostly updated people that I kind of friends with, friends and stuff and house parties. So there’s always that kind of knowledge of it. And then in my thought, more 30s, that’s kind of when, like, late 20s, 30s, that’s more when, like, apps were kicking off. So you mean more strangers? And that was a point where it’s kind where it’s kind of starting to be a bit more challenging to think about, okay, how am I going to broach this as a topic?

And it’s I’ve gotten better at over time, but it’s still very difficult to do, and it’s purely based on, you know, the nature of the person I’m speaking to as well, because if they’re quite flirty and forward or whatever, it’s easier to bring it up, but if they’re more reserved, it’s obviously something that kind of leave a bit later down the line, and then we decide when to actually make that statement. But so then I definitely prefer to do it before. You know, clothes come off where possible, but it’s still, you know, there’s always the issue of it souring things for sure.

Kevin Anthony 24:59
And if you’re going out on dates with them, and you know, maybe this is because of some of the stuff that we talked about earlier, like, you know, the way that you, you know, dress and find ways to hide it. But like, I’m imagining, if you’ve been on some dates yet, and you haven’t been to the point where clothes are coming off, like, she’s probably got an idea already, because it’s not exactly the easiest thing to hide.

Matt Barr 25:23
No. I mean, that is true. I think it depends, because, like some some have a very good idea. I’ll pick it up quickly, whatever. One might even drop a hit or two in a very subtle way at some point. But I’ve definitely had women who had no clue at all not to expect because you can dress badly enough, or you go, you mostly meet, like if you’re meeting mostly in the evenings, where it’s dark and they’re not making an effort to look really, you know, or you get you might go to the mic. Meet a restaurant, you’re there first, you’re already sat down, you know, they’re gonna see anything for a while. Or had dates where you meet on Zoom, on chat and Zoom before you go in person. So situations like that, where there’s no indication of what’s down there? It’s probably different. You’re going to a park or something, I’d like to during the day, you’re going to see it a lot more. But, yeah, it varies so much. What’s don’t? I just stereotype it.

Kevin Anthony 26:12
So when you finally get to that situation where clothes are coming off, what is the general reaction the first time that a woman sees it?

Matt Barr 26:20
I mean, even when they know there is, it is shock, I think that’s the way to describe it, because they’ve not seen one like that. Realistically, even if, you know, absolutely, I’ve been with women who said, Oh, I was with an ex who was, you know, 12 inches, it’s fine. You know, been with a big guy before, and they see it, and they go that guy, maybe he wasn’t 12 inches. This is, if this is what 12 inches is what I would love, which is like, then definitely this is not what I was expecting. Because I think often when you think of it as well, you’re thinking it is either compared to like a sex toy, where they are sized differently because they include, like the insertable length. So the 12-inch dildo or something would not be 12 inches, so that would be insertable because it would be the rest of these 12 inches, only eight inches insertable.

And they’re not necessarily thinking also in terms of the girth of it and, like the volume and how, how it all kind of comes together. Even if they’ve got a number in their head, even if they’ve got that number right, they don’t think about it is a 3d shape necessarily, especially not what it’s right there and, you know, moving and everything. So it’s allowed. Yeah, there’s a bit of just a shock factor, I think, where simply there is, here’s everything they said. So it’s Look at that. There had been some troopers, troopers who were quite excited and keen, rather than shocked, and somebody has been terrified to like, Oh, nope, even when with the warning.

Kevin Anthony 27:36
So yeah, that was the next question I had, which is, have you ever run into a situation where a woman was like, you know, you may have told her that you were large, and she’s like, okay, you know, I’ve been with large men before. And then she sees it, and she’s just like, nope, can’t do it.

Matt Barr 27:49
Oh, yeah, plenty, plenty of times. Like, quite a lot, realistically, in terms of, not, sorry, like, no, no, leave, leave the room. But like, more like, okay, we’re not going to do it. Sometimes it’s not going to do anything tonight. Or, you know, just you know, just nothing penetrative anyway, because of this. Sometimes it’s, you know, it just changed. It just changes things in terms of what their expectations are, necessarily, not always a hard No, but still just like, Okay, this is a change of plans, perhaps, when they see it.

Kevin Anthony 28:17
The reason I wanted to ask that question is that, you know, I’ve never known anybody as large as you, but I’ve had a few friends over the years that had, you know, significantly large, large enough penises, and one of the things that they’ve shared with me is that this has happened to them quite often, where they meet a woman and it gets to that point where they’re going to have sex, and she just looks at it and it’s like, no way, right?

Matt Barr 28:42
Yeah, that’s why youhave to get a bit of warning, I think, especially if they haven’t, if they haven’t given warning. So that’s gonna be even worse.

Kevin Anthony 28:47
Yeah, absolutely. And this is, you know, again, part of what I want to do with this episode is just, you know, for all the guys who are like, Man, I wish I had a penis that big. Like, I really want you to understand that you know, there are challenges that come with that. And you know, for every guy that, and I actually haven’t really heard much of this, but you know, if there are men out there that have been turned down for being too small, which generally isn’t the case, most women would be like, Okay, well, let’s see what we can do with it, right? But on the other end of the spectrum, when you’re very large, it is a reality that some women are just going to say no. And you know, that can be, you know, men think, Oh, it’s so amazing to have this big penis. But is it really amazing when a woman is like, I just, I can’t, right, like, that’s, I imagine, probably rather challenging for you to deal with?

Matt Barr 29:33
Yeah, it is. It is difficult because I’m not like, the most, most charming or like, seductive guy in terms of my own personality. So you do meet someone who is like, matches your style, everything, and you get really close, and then, because of a physical reason, you can’t progress things. That’s definitely a bit of you know, about my own, you know, if I was average, maybe things would be very different. So you have that issue, whereas, realistically, you say, if it’s very. Someone’s going to be so small, it’s going to have a huge impact on them. Obviously, it could be psychologically damaging, but practically, you’re going to manage to do whatever you want with them. You just have to work around it. It’s like if you’re on the extremes, you got to find ways to work.

Kevin Anthony 30:15
Exactly and that is what I want to talk about next. I want to pause for a short break for a second, sponsor, when we come back, I want to talk about the realities of what it’s like to actually have sex. And you know how you’ve made that work for you? Because I think there could be a lot of benefit for the men who really are larger and are, you know, going I don’t know what to do. It’s not working. It hurts her, or whatever it is, I’d love to hear your advice on how you make that work. So that’s what we’re going to talk about on the other side of this short break.

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All right, so we’ve talked about, you know, what happens when you’re meeting somebody, and how you sort of break the news to her, and then, you know what her reaction is, and all that. Let’s talk about the realities of what it’s like, you know, actually using it during sex. So what I’d like to know is, you know, what if any challenges do you tend to have? And then, what are the things that you figured out that make sex better for you, easier for you, better for her, potentially easier for her.

Matt Barr 31:58
Yeah, I mean, I suppose it comes down to, realistically, there’s two aspects. There’s the getting hard, getting fully roused, everything. There’s a challenge there, just because more to do. And then there’s obviously actual penetration as well. That’s, that’s challenging. So I think there are the two separate, two separate issues that I’ve worked on, kind of my whole life, really, in terms of trying to how to figure out, what are this what’s the solution to, you know, getting a, what’s the word, a square peg in a round hole type thing.

Kevin Anthony 32:27
Okay, so this is interesting. This is another thing that I think a lot of men who wish they had really large penises don’t necessarily realize, is that when your penis is that large, it can potentially be more difficult to achieve interaction and also maintain an erection.

Matt Barr 32:45
Yes, definitely. I think I’m quite fortunate. I think because of the, well, I’ll say, some of the stuff I’ve been doing over my life has helped me. There’s not as much of an issue as it could be. But also, because it is quite a large flashing as well, there’s a lot of blood in it, default arrest, but it’s not, yeah. Again, if it was, for example, going from half the size to full size. Now, the time that would take the blood flow that would take, that would be extremely challenging.

Kevin Anthony 33:09
Yeah, is there anything that you’ve identified to make that easier for you, like, if you are having challenges, achieving and maintaining an erection?

Matt Barr 33:18
Yeah, I think part of it is. It’s obviously psychological, like a lot of it, a lot of it’s psychological in terms of you just gotta be in that mood and that mindset and be able to focus on it and not be stressed out. Because I know when I was initially having, I mean, when I was younger, it was different, because, you know, you get hard instantly. I think, wherever you are when you’re like a teenager, and then as you go through life, it’s challenging, especially, you know, certainly cases where I had a few drinks and you go, remit, takes a go back or something, and then that’s where it happens. You’re like, Oh my God. And then you get your own head about it, and you panic about it. Oh, well, if I can’t do it again, well, it’s gone for good.

So I kind of had to, as a fairly anxious person in general. I think part of just the mindset approach of just being okay, okay. It’ll take time, but it’ll come then it will be effective that way. I think there’s also like constant stimulation because there’s no surface area to kind of cover. So if she’s doing something with it, I’m doing something with it, then that helps a lot as well. And yeah, I think before that, I think also just making sure to keep the blood flow up in general. So whatever kind of exercises I kind of do, but some exercises to try and be try and make it a bit more, like Fuller the rest of the time, not for any size reason, just because that makes it a lot easier to get erect when that happens.

Kevin Anthony 34:30
And then, what about penetration? So have you had challenges with that? How do you work with that?

Matt Barr 34:37
Of course, yeah. I mean, there’s, well, there are two areas, obviously, there’s this girth, which is more challenging, and there’s length, because with length, there are depth limiter rings like coming close, and all those other brands where you deliberately have something around your base or whatever much you need to do. So whatever kind of movement you make, you aren’t going to be causing too much of a distress. And. Them, because you only get, you know, 567, inches in. But obviously, with care, that’s not really an issue. So it’s much more a case of foreplay and lots of lots of foreplay and lubrication. There’s not really much more around it. Unfortunately, you want to find a quick fix, but there isn’t one. It’s just make sure they’re very much in the mood, very much aware of what it could be a challenge, but be fun.

Kevin Anthony 35:22
Yeah, and you hit all three of the things I was hoping you would say.

Matt Barr 35:25
I’ve done this a few times now.

Kevin Anthony 35:30
I want this to be educational, right? So this is if you’re a man listening and you’re very large, obviously this, these are some things you can do. And also, if you’re a woman listening and your man is very large, and you know, he’s not aware of these things, this would be helpful. So what are, what are those three things? Just to reiterate what you said, number one, really good foreplay. And as you said, girth isn’t really an issue because women have the ability to really expand and take in a lot of girth. However, she’s going to need Enough foreplay to be really turned on. She’s like you said, got to really be in the mood. Got to really be turned on. So if you are a man who’s abnormally large, you’re going to just have to take more time, right? You’re going to have to take more time.

Matt Barr 36:14
Yeah, no quickies allowed in my life, really. But that’s fine.

Kevin Anthony 36:18
Actually, most men don’t take enough time with the foreplay anyway. No, I know. So this is actually not really a problem. The women will love it, because they want more foreplay as it is. That’s what I find. The second thing is, obviously, use lubrication, right? That’s always helpful. And then the other one that you mentioned are the depth limiting rings, which are from I’ve never had to use a depth limiting ring, but from my friends and clients who have, they say it’s really a game changer for them. Yeah. So I actually on my website at Kevin Anthony coaching.com forward such products. I have a whole bunch of products there, you know, to improve people’s sex. One of them is a depth limiting a set of depth-limiting rings from a company called, ohnut on there.

So if you’re listening to this and you’re like, Ooh, that sounds like something that would work for me, you can do that. I think you might have some that you’ll promote later on, at least a company that you’re working with. So we’ll let you share that with people in a little bit as well. But the idea is, just know that there are things out there, right? There are aids out there that can help you and make this work better.

Matt Barr 37:26
Yeah, it’s still obviously a nice situation. There’s not a ton of stuff, but obviously, over my life, I’ve just picked up various tips and tricks. And the more you explore with with women or men, depending on your preference, then the more you understand how much they can typically take, how much warming up, kind of needs to happen. We still vary, obviously, on the partner, but generally exercise, you know, on the side of caution. So it’s better to do too much than too little.

Kevin Anthony 37:52
Yes, absolutely. Do you find that certain positions work better for you from just purely from a size perspective?

Matt Barr 38:01
I think especially if it’s the first time, or, you know, early times in the relationship, I think it’s them giving them the most control. I think is key. There’s some danger with that, in terms of, if they’re doing all the work and they’ve got to deal with the size as well, that could be too much. If they’re positioned where they’re comfortable and kind of positioned in a way, they can kind of relax, but also control entry. Those tend to be the best. I think typically, other than that, some of the reverse ones where you are sort of holding them and being very slow and gentle and deliberate with it is, is key. I think it’s just ones where you can’t, you can’t go too wrong. I think I mean I mean, and also it’s like, standing is surprisingly good as well, because when you’re like, kind of extra length, it’s a bit easier to do various things from that angle. And it’s something a bit different that often a lot of women haven’t tried and to enjoy.

Kevin Anthony 38:53
Yeah, standing positions for people with smaller penises actually tend to be rather challenging. So that, yeah, that could be a really good one if you are larger.

Matt Barr 39:00
because you can kind of support them as well. Because if you got size in Europe, you’ve got size and you’re already, kind of already in there, you can kind of take a lot of that bread. But they also have some control over exactly what’s what’s happening.

Kevin Anthony 39:10
Do you have any other advice for men with large penises when it comes to sex? Anything else that you’ve learned, anything else you want to share or impart to them?

Matt Barr 39:20
Yeah, my advice is always sort of, have a little a little bag of some kind, just with all your tools in them. I love to bring your own loop. Bring your own condoms, because you might not go with a partner, and they put up a normal-sized bear. They can’t really do anything with that. You just make sure you got something so wherever you are, you can always you don’t feel like you’re being cock blocked by not having the right tools and everything, I think, just being, you know, something, either in the house or if you’re going to someone else’s just have devoted the time to that, realistically, it’s worth doing.

Kevin Anthony 39:52
Yeah, that would be a shame if you were cock blocked by your own cock.

Matt Barr 39:55
Metaphysical.

Kevin Anthony 39:58
But that’s a really good suggestion, one that I hadn’t thought about, which is, yeah, to really have a bag with all the things that you need that make it possible. And that’s something that you know, you know a regular, normal-sized guy wouldn’t have to think about, because Now, granted, I fully recommend that if you are a man and you’re going to be having sex with a woman, that you take responsibility and make sure you have things like condoms with you and all of that. But in a pinch, if you don’t, she’s most likely going to have something that will work perfectly fine. But yeah, when you’re much larger, that’s not going to be the case.

Speaker 1 40:31
You can’t run to the pharmacy and grab something easily, necessarily, depending on how extreme you’re on what the stocks like.

Kevin Anthony 40:37
I imagine not. I mean, that’s interesting because, because

Matt Barr 40:44
you have, like, you know, the Trojan Magnus and stuff, but a lot of that is more a marketing thing, but they’re not. It’s larger than average, but not by much.

Kevin Anthony 40:51
I mean, not that large. And I can wear a Magnum, and it fits just fine, and it doesn’t fall off. It’s actually quite comfortable. But I’m not that large. And I always think, like, what do men that have really large penises do, because I don’t see anything bigger than that in the store.

Matt Barr 41:05
Not in the store, but they do sell them online at least. But even then, they’re not. The biggest one that’s available now is a bit under 10 inches in length, obviously, not really inserting much more than that, anyway, on average, typically, it’s very rare to get more than that in and then the girth kind of goes up to sort of eightish, anyway. So you’ve kind of covered with that, but it’s not ideal. But also, you just get more used to tight, weigh them tighter than you’d expect. Like, again, if you’re a smaller amount of weight or normal-sized condom, you’re more used to being loose. So there’s obviously a lot of a lot of ability to accommodate and get used to that.

Kevin Anthony 41:37
Yeah, for sure. And I think, you know, the thing that you need to keep in mind is that it’s going to take a little bit more planning. It’s going to take a little bit more forethought because you can’t just run to a pharmacy. She’s not going to have something that’s going to work for you, right? So you have to think a little bit ahead. If you are, you know, larger, significantly larger, and you’re going to have to prepare. You’re going to order you the stuff you need online. You’re going to put that bag together, and then, of course, you’re going to do the other things that we talked about as well. With the well, with the foreplay and, and all of that. So I think those are excellent tips for any man that’s out there that’s like, hey, you know, I struggle with how to really make this, this work?

Matt Barr 42:13
Well, yeah. And the other bit of advice is, obviously, don’t make it, you know, you could be something you’re known for. Don’t think it’s you’re only, you know, only selling point.

Kevin Anthony 42:22
Right? Have some other skills to adjust to the fact that you have a large penis.

Matt Barr 42:27
That gets you in the door sometimes, whether you know you need to have a reason to stay there,

Kevin Anthony 42:31
Absolutely, that is also great advice. All right. Well, Matt, I want to thank you for coming on the show. It’s been a really fascinating conversation, and I want to give you an opportunity. I know that you came on to specifically promote something, so I want to give you an opportunity to do that, talk about, you know what that is.

Matt Barr 42:54
So I’m here to tell you about my autobiography that’s going to hopefully come out either late this year or early next year, or a long story life with the world’s biggest penis, it’s going to be not just practical sacrifice. It’s mostly about, Well, partly, some very stories of my life, which vary from the ridiculous and silly to more serious, dramatic and sociological look at how penis sizes have been reflected in the media, so stuff like Boogie Nights now that spread a certain image of things, and the lad magazines of the 90s and onwards and stay and all these people up to the present day. And how the increased female voices have changed the impact. Maybe we’re at the point now where people realize the size isn’t the be-all, end-all. And how does that impact us? How’s that impacted me as someone living from my point of view?

So hopefully that’ll be interesting. But for everyone, once it’s been published, I’m also doing some work with a company called fleshy and you can visit them@getfleshy.com they were very keen advocates of men, knowing their bodies and what to do with them, basically. So they do lots of toys for men, they’re working on something currently, which I think we out very soon, which is sort of almost works like a VR type thing, where you can sync it to a device so you can get pleasure in time with whatever you’re watching. So people are into that sort of thing. Give them a give them a look.

Kevin Anthony 44:17
All right, all right. So you have your autobiography coming out, right? And then, of course, the flashy stuff and links for those will be in the description. So look for those. Any last things you want to share?

Matt Barr 44:31
I think, Oh, the last thing I should probably say is, obviously, in the end, you know, it doesn’t matter too much. I always, you know, we ever have a long interview, especially, it’s like, well, is that all? It’s two years. I want to just a, it’s just a slice of life. Obviously, you know, most of the time you’re not a wreck. You’re not thinking about sex. It’s just, it’s just a part of your body, like anything else, you wouldn’t be obsessed with your little life wouldn’t be devoted to your kneecap or something. You know, it’s just, it’s just part of your anatomy. You deal with it. People can have reactions to it, whether you’re big, or small, even if you’re normal. People might just say how. The oldest Hall, whatever, so you can never get the one you want. You got to work with what you’ve got. And, yeah, just keep on track with it.

Kevin Anthony 45:08
That’s great advice. It’s really grounded. And, yeah, I think it applies to everybody from, you know, the really small to the really large. You know, don’t overly focus on it. It’s just a part of your body like anything else, and then you do the best you can. You find ways to work with it, with whichever end of the spectrum that you’re on. Yeah, exactly. Well, Matt, I want to thank you for coming on the show. As I said, fascinating conversation. And I think, you know, I mean, I do this work for a living, and so I’ve spoken with other men with large penises and small penises. So I’m kind of familiar, but I think for the audience, a lot of what we talked about today and shared today was probably new to them, and probably fairly enlightening. So I really hope that people got some value out of it, and, you know, took some good advice away from the show.

Matt Barr 45:56
Yeah, I always get messages from people on both ends realistically to say, you know, give me some advice, or I’m a bit like this, whatever. Or what’s it like? Why? You know, trying to get different opinions. So I’ve got a website at biggest penis book.com, and you can always email me with questions if you’ve got anything that wasn’t covered here.

Kevin Anthony 46:16
Awesome. Sounds amazing. All right, everybody, that’s all the time I have for this episode, and I will see you next week.

I hope you liked this episode of the Love Lab podcast. If you enjoy this show, subscribe, leave me a review and share it with your friends, and for more free exclusive content, join me in the passion vault at https://www.kevinanthonycoaching.com/vault/. That’s https://www.kevinanthonycoaching.com/vault/. Thanks for listening and remember, as Celine used to say, you’re amazing!