Tips For Couples Who Work Together

Céline Remy 0:11
Welcome to the Love Lab Podcast, a safe place to get real about sex. Whether you’re a man, woman single or couple, this is the show for you. Because well, sex matters. We are your hosts Kevin Anthony and Céline Remy.

Kevin Anthony 0:28
Welcome back to the love lab podcast. This is Episode 84. And it’s titled tips for couples who work together and how we make it work. So, you know, one of the most frequent questions that we get is how do you guys work together like especially from friends to like they come over, they see we have one office, and it’s not very big. We have two desks that barely fit in it, we work side by side, and we do the podcast together we coach clients together.

Kevin Anthony 0:59
We spend a lot of time together. And so one of the questions that people often have is how do you do that and not drive each other crazy, or not just kill each other. So we thought we would do an episode on how to work together. And actually, when researching it, we find this is a common question that a lot of people have.

Céline Remy 1:20
Yes, so I’m super excited about this episode. But before we dive into it, let’s give a big shout out to our sponsor power and mastery. So if you want to join the secret club of men who are great in bed, then go to power and mastery.com This is the most complete sexual mastery training for men. You’ll find a course for if you want to last longer, have harder erections, or simply become the best lover in bed. So go to power and mastery.com to check the courses out.

Kevin Anthony 1:53
You know, we’ve been doing ads for power mastery for a while and usually, I just let you kind of read The ad but I just want to say to the men, if you ever wanted to fix something that’s wrong, like your love life isn’t the way you want it to be. You’ve got to check this out. This is the way that you can fix that.

Céline Remy 2:14
Yes, yes. So I am really excited. So we own a relationship publishing company together. We, I mean, I mean, we’re married, we share similar hobbies. I mean, we pretty much share 24 seven together. Now, that’s not true. We do take some time off. And I think this is what we’ll share too. But it is true that a lot of our time is spent together. It’s a good thing that we adore each other and love each other. I actually never feel like I have too much of you.

Kevin Anthony 2:49
That’s cool.

Céline Remy 2:50
I know. Right? I like more time like I’m sure you can squeeze in a few more minutes because he’s so awesome. So I feel like we’re very lucky. I want to say that before we get into the benefits of working together, I do want to say that it requires good skills to be able to work with somebody whether or not you’re in a committed relationship and that there’s no shortcut to developing your relating skills.

Céline Remy 3:22
And these are skills that are never taught. And unless you are willing to do the work and what it takes to upgrade your love skills, you’re not going to be successful in any type of relationship.

Kevin Anthony 3:34
Correct. And also, what you’ll find is that yes, we’re technically talking here about how to work together. But these tips, most of them, maybe not all of them are also going to apply to your relationship in general. Right, because whether it’s a working relationship or a romantic relationship, it’s still a relationship and a lot of the same things will apply. So Let’s, let’s talk about why would you want to work with your significant other?

Céline Remy 4:05
Well, here’s my number one and it’s not on the list. I’m going totally off the list, because you’re freaking awesome. And I just wanted to bring more awesomeness into the world.

Kevin Anthony 4:15
Okay, that’s awesome. I love that. The people that maybe don’t think that it’s so awesome, or their partners that also

Céline Remy 4:27
have the right partner.

Kevin Anthony 4:28
That’s just how it is. That’s a good point. Yeah, you think your partner is awesome or you’re with the wrong partner? For sure.

Céline Remy 4:33
Absolutely. Well, then that’s kind of the benefit number one is that you get to spend a lot of time together. So if you love each other, it does increase the time that you have together because that is one of the things that many working couple notice that they don’t get to spend much time they see each other maybe for an hour or two in the evening, the super tired and that’s it. When you get to work together. You get to increase exponentially the amount of time you spend with one another Yeah, and

Kevin Anthony 5:00
that’s, that’s one of the number one complaints is that you get up, you got to get the kids ready for school and you go off to work, you work all day, then you come back, you probably have some errands to run after work because you’ve been at work all day, you got kids stuff to take care of again, and you know, you basically don’t get to spend any time together. So yes, a potential benefit would be you’d get to spend more time with the person that you choose to be with.

Kevin Anthony 5:28
Here’s one that I wouldn’t have thought of on the list because I’ve never actually personally experienced this before. But apparently, some companies if you both work for the same company, actually do have some benefits for couples who work in their organizations. And there apparently are even firms that award a huge amount to the couple. I lost my place, a husband-wife that belong to the firm.

Kevin Anthony 5:55
So basically, what they’re saying here is that there are some companies that might actually incentivize you for working together as a couple. I’ve never personally experienced that in the corporate world, but I suppose it’s possible and that could be a potential benefit.

Céline Remy 6:09
It’s interesting because when we were planning this show, I never thought about working together for somebody else. I only pictured it as being you work together for yourself, your own company, just like what we are, you know. So it’s really an interesting point. But there’s, there’s a lot of

Kevin Anthony 6:25
different ways fresher.

Céline Remy 6:27
That’s true. Again, like so many options, you got to find what works for you.

Kevin Anthony 6:31
Yeah. And what we’ll see as we get into some other lists, you know, like tips and things like that as we go along, you’ll realize that they don’t all apply to every situation like, you could have a situation like us where we own a company together. Okay. You could have a situation where you’re both worked for some other third party company, maybe in the same capacity, maybe in very different capacities.

Céline Remy 6:55
Oh my gosh, what if one is like the boss of the other?

Kevin Anthony 6:59
Yeah. I don’t know if she’s the boss. Probably most companies wouldn’t allow that. But you might have this sort of thing where like, they’re both lawyers and they work for the same firm, but they don’t own the firm. Right? God or it may be that he works in the engineering department and she works in accounting. Right? There are so many different possibilities. Okay.

Céline Remy 7:21
All right. Well, all right. Let’s continue with our benefits.

Kevin Anthony 7:24
Okay, so the next one is an easy commute.

Céline Remy 7:26
Yes, I mean, it makes it easy. Well, what makes it easier is when you work from home.

Kevin Anthony 7:31
Yeah, I love our commute. the commute is a walk downstairs, bedroom to office.

Céline Remy 7:40
You know, number four is that it makes it that you can plan your days off together. When you work together like it’s easier to plan your vacation times off because you are just in the same field in the same company or whatever that is,

Kevin Anthony 7:55
well, so one of the potential benefits is that you’re coming company because you both work for the same one. They’d be off on the same day. Yes. Like, you know, around Christmas, some companies will take the whole week off in between Christmas and New Year’s and other companies won’t, right? So if you work for two different ones, you’re like, Well, I have off, but I don’t. If you work for the same one you might both have off. However, you’ll see that’s also a potential downside when we get to

Céline Remy 8:18
That’s exactly what I was thinking… I can see this as a downside to

Kevin Anthony 8:22
It certainly could be.

Céline Remy 8:23
Number five is that you get to share similar interests. And that’s very important. And whether it’s at work, or whether it’s like in life in general, you should just share similar interests. If you don’t, I don’t think you have a base for being together.

Kevin Anthony 8:38
If you work in the same industry and for the same company, then likely you have similar interests because you’re both doing a similar thing.

Céline Remy 8:46
So, so that’s good, that actually is good for your relationship in general. Mm-hmm. I think another thing too, as a benefit, some say that there’s a greater dedication towards work and I think that’s really true when it’s your own company. Because especially if you make no plan B.

Kevin Anthony 9:06
Burn the lifeboats.

Céline Remy 9:08
Well, what that makes you too is that you start to become more resourceful as a couple like you are a team. We call each other team us.

Kevin Anthony 9:17
And now that’s something that I want everybody to remember because that’s gonna be going to become very important as we talk about some of these things later on.

Céline Remy 9:24
Yes, team, team, US and US stand for unstoppable success. We like acronyms. We put them in everything we do, and they feel really good. And you got to have these little things that keep you moving forward. What that does to is that it brings more respect as a couple, especially when you can move through like rough patches and successes. I mean, it really builds you up.

Céline Remy 9:46
And in our last benefit of what it does to work together as you get a better understanding because most of the time as we see it in our relationship, you each have different strengths. you each have places that you bring into things you bring into the company into the relationship that makes you unique. And you can understand each other better by seeing how each other work and handle stress and difficult situations and stuff like that,

Kevin Anthony 10:13
for sure. And you know, you realize that like, okay, let’s say that one person works out in a stressful environment, and maybe the other person’s home, take care of the kids. And it can go either way. It doesn’t have to necessarily be the guy working in the woman taking care of the kids. And that’s probably more common, but it’s not the only way. So he comes home, he’s super stressed out. And, you know, it’s not that she doesn’t have understanding, but she’s like, hey, I’ve been home all day.

Kevin Anthony 10:43
And I’m stressed out too. And you know, I want you to do this, that or the other thing. One of the benefits of working together is both parties equally understand what went on that day. What kind of stress was involved in what the person was dealing with, right? It’s so much easier to have compassion. For somebody when you understand, like, wow, today was just a train wreck of a workday.

Kevin Anthony 11:07
That’s happened last week was a bit of a workweek, you know? And so you can understand what they went through. You can have compassion I, other than them, yeah. Otherwise, they just have to come home and try to explain it to and you’re like, Okay, whatever, you know,

Céline Remy 11:24
yeah. Okay, so these are good benefits. Let’s talk a little bit about some of the downsides. And then, of course, we will be giving you our tips and diving in more into what we do and what works for us. But really like, having, you know, like, some of the downsides, because I think that’s what people sometimes do get first and like, should I do it? Should I not do it? Should we take the plunge and do this together?

Céline Remy 11:48
The first thing is that well, do you have an unknown life that’s fully true, but little change in daily schedules? Well, actually, it’s kind of true. We kind of have a schedule here right now. Our Right. But we have a schedule that we do like so we have set up a routine. We have a pre-work routine, we have a work routine, we take good lunch breaks. And then we because we are working together, we basically make our company work around what we like for ourselves. And so at least even if it’s the same routine, it’s something that we like.

Kevin Anthony 12:24
Yeah, I mean, this came up when researching potential downsides of working together. I’m not so sure I really see it as a downside. I mean, every entrepreneur book that you read, every successful person tells you about the importance of having a regular schedule. So I don’t really see having a regular schedule as a downside. And I actually see when you work for two different things, especially if you have kids involved,

Kevin Anthony 12:54
Right because you got kids, you got this job and this job and you got to try to court All of those things at once, which I see is more of a downside than knowing like, at least if we work together, we got one job to coordinate and then maybe the kids, as opposed. So I don’t know. It could be a downside for some people. I don’t see it as that much of a downside.

Céline Remy 13:17
So I’m going to go through some of the downsides a little quickly here because I’m more interested.

Kevin Anthony 13:23
We want to get to the tips.

Céline Remy 13:23
Yeah, exactly. So some of the things that will hold people back like oh my gosh, like this lack of personal space, like we were saying, saying, we’re sharing an office, we’re sharing our home, we’re sharing company, there are all of these things. What happens if you’re not very good at managing your emotions? And there are things like jealousy that arises or conflicts and you don’t know how to soothe them and make them better?

Céline Remy 13:48
What if you get stuck into a power struggles? Like when I was saying what if she’s the CEO or like what you know, and because that’s going to come up like you each have to feel comfortable with the title you give each other and I how you interact with one another.

Kevin Anthony 14:01
And there’s a really easy way to deal with most of that stuff, which we’ll talk about when we get to the tips. It’s so simple, you won’t even believe it.

Céline Remy 14:08
Exactly. That’s not even going to come up any more power struggles like that. One downside to for sure is that’s that idea of job security. It’s actually an illusion.

Kevin Anthony 14:20
Well, it is. But in this case, really what they’re talking about is, is you’re going to have all your eggs in one basket, right? You work together, let’s say you work for another company. And then that company has a downturn and they close now you’re both out of work instead of only one of you. So you know that that’s the downside there when it comes to job security.

Céline Remy 14:40
And then last is the reverse of like, Hey, you can each take time off together is actually when you both work for the same company when you are the company owners and CEOs and all of that. Sometimes it’s hard to be like can we leave it on like cruise control for a week while we take a week off both of us together. So that’s good. Be a challenge for some people.

Kevin Anthony 15:01
And this is what we’re talking about when we’re going over the benefits, which is if you both work for the same company if you’re in maybe say the same department, it’s entirely possible that the company could say, but we can’t do without both of you at the same time. So that’s a possibility. I mean, I don’t know if you work for corporate and you’re listening to us, you probably have run into this at one time or another.

Kevin Anthony 15:26
But I know when I worked for corporate, I would often say, hey, I’d like to take a vacation at such and such a time. They’re like, Oh, no, no, no, we’ve got this major project. You can’t take a vacation until it’s over. And you’re like over, I can be like six months from now. You know? I mean, seriously, that’s the kind of stuff they used to say. So you know, it’s a potential downside that you may find it more difficult to get time off if you work together.

Céline Remy 15:52
Alright, so we are going to get into our tips. But before that, we’ve got a question for you.

Céline Remy 15:59
Are you longing for more connection, deeper intimacy and red hot passion in your relationship? If you are a committed couple who loves each other but has lost the spark and has fallen into a boring routine, we have a special invite for you. We’ve created a program called relationship synergy. It’s a cutting edge next level intimacy program for the modern couple to help you fire up your love life.

Céline Remy 16:25
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Kevin Anthony 16:43
Alright, so we’ve talked about the benefits. We’ve talked about the potential downsides. So if you work together or you’re thinking about working together, what are some tips to make this work? So we’ve got two lists of tips. The first list is just one that Celine and I brainstorm because we work together. As she said, We own a relationship publishing company together.

Kevin Anthony 17:08
So we’re like, what are some of the things we’ve learned from working together? Over these years? And then and then the second list is a whole list of stuff that we compiled from other experts out there in the interwebs. And we’ll see how those two really like matchup like, you know, are we doing what the experts say? Did they come up with stuff we haven’t thought of? We’ll find out.

Céline Remy 17:33
Number one, and it’s always the same in everything you do right? Know your why!

Kevin Anthony 17:39
Yeah, this was big. I had to put this at the top of the list. You have to know why you’re working together. Because if it’s just like, well, because of it just sort of happened that way or because we didn’t know what else to do or because one of them couldn’t find a job. So it was like, hey, come work with me kind of thing. You really want to know your why? Because let’s be honest, it’s not always easy. That’s not right. And so you have to be it has to be tied to a bigger Why

Céline Remy 18:11
yes. And you know, go deeper than we just want to make good money together because yes, that’s awesome. But it’s like, why is there like I said, the freedom and then you know, there’s the selfish why for yourself or yourself as an individual and yourself as a couple. And then there’s a why also more like a humanitarian kind of like for the planet.

Céline Remy 18:31
And if you’re not doing something good for the overall planet of everyone involved. It’s not going to be very nourishing on a soul level. So I think if you can have all of it, you’re selfish Y and Z like bigger, why that goes beyond you and your relationship. It will really keep that fire going.

Kevin Anthony 18:53
Yeah, exactly. And when things get tough, you can reflect back on that “why” and it will keep you going.

Céline Remy 19:01
Okay, I like this one other tip is about being polite with each other. And it’s interesting because sometimes in the workplace people tend to get really mad at each other right? Or like, they have a short fuse and like kind of say on this, like, go with the name, name, calling each other and stuff. And you got to remember that at the end of the day is the husband and wife or boyfriend and girlfriend, whatever you call yourselves.

Céline Remy 19:25
And you can just be like, hey, you’re such an asshole and call this person like that, because they’ll still remember at the end of the day when you shift back into lover modes, you know, so being able to use a little bit of politeness, because I’m really long way.

Kevin Anthony 19:43
Yeah, you can’t say to the jury to disregard that statement. It doesn’t work in a jury either. By the way, once you’ve heard it, you heard it, but anyway, you got to be polite, and you know, and this kind of goes for working in general, but I can’t tell you how many times working in corporate where I had to deal with like, really stupid bosses or just immediate co-workers, but because they have a higher title than you or because they’re technically your boss, you know, they’re going to tell you how it goes and so many times you just want to tell them you know.

Kevin Anthony 20:15
Shut the fuck up you pencil neck little fucking stupid ass dork. You know, you don’t know shit, you’re an idiot. You couldn’t find your way out of the server room, you know, more or less, fix something. So that’s

Céline Remy 20:30
Exactly what not to tell your spouse.

Kevin Anthony 20:31
Exactly. Well, that’s where I was going with that is like, those are the things that come up a lot. You don’t want us to really say them.

Céline Remy 20:45
You gotta remember that you humans. And I think that if you have an understanding in your relationship that you both are going to show up doing your best at all times. Your best will vary. Some days you’ll be like me like I’m having all teary-eyed thinking about that. Because you like knowing that you showing up and giving you all and giving your best and you can be okay with your partner making a mistake because you know like he did his best or she did her best.

Céline Remy 21:12
And if that’s the baseline of your relationship, you can go through anything. But you have to remember that you have to have that in place as you make this commitment to show up 100% even though that 100% will be slightly different because hey, today you have a headache or you have low energy or today you’re on fire, but know that you showing up as your best self every day. Absolutely.

Kevin Anthony 21:38
So along with being polite and not saying those things and all that we also have great communication skills. This is really important. You have to learn how to effectively communicate and compassionately communicate. Huge, huge is probably one of the most important skills on the list.

Céline Remy 22:00
Oh, yeah. You know, what’s interesting is that it’s an ever-evolving skill, right? Sometimes you’ll be stressed out or triggered and you won’t be able to speak exactly the way that should you should speak. And so we had something this weekend where I wasn’t expressing myself very well. I meant to say one thing, you heard something really different than what I’m even meant to say or said.

Céline Remy 22:26
And it was like, Okay, how could I have done it better? So after that, we reflected, should we have a safe word? Or like, how could we deflect something when we start to see that we going downhill like, Is it like, okay, I hear you and I need about a pause in a sec. Okay. Like once you start to see that you’re going down that like or like, big like a crash, stop it.

Céline Remy 22:48
You don’t have to like, stay on the in the train, if it’s crashing, you know, and that’s how you need to learn these things because you’re not always going to be spectacular at communication, but have in place the skills, do your best and have some ways of like, just like pausing when it gets too heated. All right, I want to talk about mixing things up. That’s so sexy. Right?

Kevin Anthony 23:15
And mix it up a little this weekend.

Céline Remy 23:20
Yeah, we had sex outside, on the chair and inside on the couch and back outside of right where we got married. Yeah, there was great. Three different locations. Awesome. Anyway, that’s not what we’re talking about here. We’re talking about a meeting at the conference room, aka the dining room table. Cool names, you know, and change things.

Céline Remy 23:43
You know, sometimes, like, let’s have a power meeting on the table outside, you know, like, it’s not always in the office, right? And when you do that, some studies have shown that kids do better with the homework if you’re not always just at the same desk. And so you can take that same concept for your relationship and your work where it’s like, hey, let’s like even though your office is great, sometimes it’s good to even go sometimes have like a lunch meeting, like go eat out and take a notepad and do your business meeting at lunch or something like this, it makes a difference.

Kevin Anthony 24:18
Yeah, the only thing I would caution on that one is, you know, it’s very trendy right now for entrepreneurs, to be like your sort of traveling laptop entrepreneur, which means they don’t have any area set up in their home space for an actual like a professional office. And they just figured that wherever they are with their laptop, they can do it. And there is a beautiful freedom to that.

Kevin Anthony 24:42
And there’s also something to be said for having a dedicated space where you can actually have phone calls and meetings and get stuff done and have organization and be an actual professional. So what we do is we have those spaces. is set up, and we are professionals. And every once in a while we’re like, okay, let’s get out of the office and just do it differently mix it up a little.

Céline Remy 25:10
And it’s funny you’re saying about like that putting this part because the next one was like, dress the part. And I know it’s a big thing where people are like, Oh, yeah, working from home means I can be in sweats all day long. We actually dress up, you know, of course, you’re not dressing up the same like I’m not putting heels or you’re not putting like a suit and tie like you would have to do or shaving is not the same.

Céline Remy 25:33
But there’s something about, I want to feel good. I want to feel like a million dollar. I want to run this company and I’m showing up for it fully. And it’s okay that some days you’re in your sweats, but it’s good sometimes to just dress the part because also you take each other seriously, more seriously. We’re like, yeah, you look good. It’s like, yeah, you’re the CEO of this company.

Kevin Anthony 25:52
Yeah, absolutely. You know, I mean, as you said, it’s okay to be comfy from time to time, but Yeah, you want to treat your business? Like it’s professional? Mm-hmm. All right, next one, I want to talk about this one. Okay. Be each other’s cheerleader. And so this is basically this is like we were talking about the cure for some of the potential downsides. Like, it’s so simple, you won’t even you won’t even understand. What it is is team us.

Kevin Anthony 26:29
You know, we call it team us, you can call it whatever you want to call it. But the idea is that whether you’re working together for your own business, or you’re working together in somebody else’s business, you are a team. And the relationship comes first. If you’re two lawyers, working for a firm, and one of you gets promoted, and the other one doesn’t, you don’t go into jealousy because like I should have gotten the promotion and you look at it you go, what’s good for the team is good for both of us.

Kevin Anthony 26:58
The fact that one of you guys Promotion and is now making more money or maybe in a position to dictate the work that you actually do, or whatever it is, that’s a

Céline Remy 27:07
good thing for you as a team. And this is a, whether you’re working together or not, this is how you should view your relationship, your team. Uh-huh. And whatever is good for the team is good for both of you. Absolutely. And also being HIV cheerleaders means you know, the day when one of you is like not seeing how great you are, like be like, I don’t know you have days where you doubt your own abilities.

Céline Remy 27:33
Your partner can be like reminding you of like, all the great things you do, who you are and how much of an asset you are for the company. And that kind of leads to the Latin the following point that we had which is being each other’s PR. And what I love about this when we work together is I don’t have to go to social people like meetings and parties and talk about what I do our sketch, talk about how great Kevin is and how well he is part of the company, that we own together and he does the same for me.

Céline Remy 28:03
And it’s really cool because also you get to hear, like, amazing things about yourself through your partners like the description to other people, and it feels really good. You act as cheerleaders, you act as PR, like, it’s really bonding.

Kevin Anthony 28:20
Yeah, this is big, because I can tell you in all the years I worked in corporate, nobody was ever a cheerleader for me. You know, it’s like, it’s not that you never heard ever that you did a good job. But, you know, I worked as a fairly high-level position in corporate America. And I can tell you that mostly what I got, it was like, it was like traditional Japanese martial arts. If you’ve ever trained in a traditional Japanese martial art, it kind of goes like this.

Kevin Anthony 28:51
You’re either constantly being told that you’re doing it wrong. Or you’re not being told anything. And so here’s the thing you knew that you did it right training traditional Japanese martial arts when they don’t say anything. That’s their way of saying “good job” they’re just quiet. They’re not criticizing you. That’s how you know you did a good job. And corporate America was very much like that. It was pretty rare that anybody ever was like, wow, you did a great job.

Kevin Anthony 29:19
They’re either just bitching at you and complaining about shit, or they just didn’t say anything. And that’s honestly, that’s just bullshit. It’s nonsense. And if you’re going to work with your significant other, Wow, what an amazing miracle to been in an environment where somebody actually tells you did a good job and congratulate you.

Céline Remy 29:38
And you know, that goes a long way with your relationship bringing more appreciation into your relationship goes so it just makes things much better. So it will definitely work. Remember that whole idea of the power struggle when you feel seen when you feel appreciated? When you feel acknowledged for your hard work, the little things you take care of, and it depends, you know, Each one of you might want some slight difference like in terms of the appreciation, one may want more appreciation around the all the little things that they do.

Céline Remy 30:10
The other one might be more about the overall how smooth the company operates and like things like that it doesn’t matter you can tell each other also what which appreciation lens best and, and you can just witness your partner but this will absolutely transform how good you feel about yourself, how good you feel about your relationship and how good you feel about your company. Now we have two more tips here for people who work together that I think is really essential.

Céline Remy 30:40
Number one is about setting good boundaries. And that means that you are very clear on like, this is what I need are what’s required for me to work well. You know, there are things like I need total silence when I work when I do Writing and every time I’m like writing a sales page or different things like that, I need to not be disturbed hearing Kevin even, like, slightly. Cough irritates me. And so, you know, I let him know about that you need to not be disturbed when you are doing like complex swings in the back end of our technology and you’re looking at things and it’s like, I can be like asking you questions, you know, and stuff like that.

Céline Remy 31:24
So we’ve learned what each other needs and we’ve found ways to also like either I go to a different room or I put on headphones with like, binary beats and things that just like keeps me focused, whatever that is what you need to be able to express your boundary and set them okay.

Kevin Anthony 31:41
Yeah, and that’s the thing is when you’re working together, and you’re married, or you’re living together, or whatever it is. You spend a lot of time together and so boundaries are really important. But I think when it comes to setting good boundaries, and we’re talking about working together, the biggest thing that I find especially if you own your own business is you have to set boundaries about this is work time.

Kevin Anthony 32:07
This is not working time, this is “us” time, this is playtime. This is you know, time with the kids, whatever it is, that is really important because what tends to happen far too often for entrepreneurs is that it’s always just working time to talk about it anytime.

Céline Remy 32:27
like making love and like, how about this new name for our program and you like we’re freaking making love right now.

Kevin Anthony 32:34
Yeah, so sorry, that. Also, that was my issue this weekend is I had to set a boundary because I was completely burnt out from the week. And I had to say, Look, you’re asking me questions about business stuff on Saturday, and I was like, I’m not doing it. I just cannot do any more business. It’s fucking Saturday.

Céline Remy 32:56
Things I can work is. For me, what I’ve done is I have a little notepad next to the bed so that I can write down my ideas. It takes an amazing amount of self-control to not bother Kevin, but write it down. And then I can like, bring the map to our business meeting, you know, things that we’ve done too is like, okay, we don’t interrupt each other, even if we right next to each other. And we make a request, like, hey, I need a 20 minutes power meeting to go over this problem that I have.

Céline Remy 33:26
When can we do it today or tomorrow, that we really play again, as a team and play around that concept that not everything goes when we make enough we’ve making love. I mean, sometimes we intentionally make love to get ideas for a new program or whatever we creating. And so it’s infused with love, and it’s amazing, but it’s the intention. If that has not been said at the beginning. Don’t bring your business stuff in the bedroom.

Kevin Anthony 33:52
Yeah, that’s just how it goes. You know, that’s a boner killer.

Céline Remy 33:55
It is. Just like we had to teach ourselves to unplug. From like having phones or technology on the weekend, it’s hard at first to unplug from being like company owners business people and be like wow like because you live, breathe it all the time but you have to force yourself and like you unlearn the habit and then it becomes easier.

Kevin Anthony 34:19
It’s a must if you want to maintain sanity. So along with that is actually the last tip which is to make sure that you have you know, I wrote down meet time, downtime, cave time, whatever you want to call it. But because you’re together as a couple and you’re working together, you have to make sure that you have some downtime, some you time to do whatever it is and it could be as a guy to go do stuff with the guys.

Kevin Anthony 34:45
Or it could just be man cave time or you’re in your cave doing your thing. For women it can be, spending time with your girlfriends or you know, in your she shed whatever it is.

Céline Remy 34:54
Yeah, and so that’s the beauty of having interdependence and independent And playing with all of that and having clear times, playtimes where you come together as a couple to not work on your business, but like play in your relationship and create more love times where you have times for nurturing your own cup in yourself and times to be together as working units.

Céline Remy 35:19
And if you put these in place, you will avoid a lot of the pitfalls and it’s actually fun, thrilling thriving, to own a business together to run a company together. It has a lot of potential for deep fulfillment.

Kevin Anthony 35:35
Yeah, so we’re getting pretty close to the end of this episode. But I just wanted to quickly run down this list of other experts tips,

Céline Remy 35:44
really, you’re going to go through that I figured we were gonna skip it

Kevin Anthony 35:47
now. And I’m just going to read through it real fast and I have to do commentary on every single one of them, but I want to see where they match up with the things that we’ve already talked about. Alright, so the first one gives each other enough space.

All right, that one recovered, you need to set boundaries at work as well as home. Okay, boom, we got that one covered, scheduled date nights. That’s something that we talk a lot about on this show. So it’s funny, we didn’t put it on our list of things for working together. But it is absolutely on our list of things to make a good relationship.

Kevin Anthony 36:21
At work, being professional is essential. We got that covered. We talked about that one. Relationship reassessments are necessary. Oh, that’s interesting. That’s where they’re talking about likes every once in a while to stop and reassess, like, is this really working for you as a relationship? And you know, we’ve talked in the past to that, that you should actually be doing this throughout your relationship like you should be looking at your relationship and seeing and what’s working, what’s not doing need to make changes. So that’s a good one.

Céline Remy 36:51
Course correct, absolutely.

Kevin Anthony 36:53
Effective communication. Yep. Yeah, that one. Listening is is is an important trait to both Yeah, yeah, yeah, that’s true. I would kind of throw that in with effective communication is effective communication requires good listening.

Céline Remy 37:08
But it’s a good point to mention is that there should be listening on both parts. Both counts.

Kevin Anthony 37:13
Yep. Yep. Make your interaction or communication clear. Okay, so some more good clear communication, prioritize tasks and tasks and divide equally. We got that covered.

Céline Remy 37:25
Oh, hold on. There was a point that I’m not seeing that I had in there about the task. Oh, it’s in there. And I skipped it.

Kevin Anthony 37:32
Divide the tasks, I

Céline Remy 37:33
just get the task. You have to think equitable, not equal when it comes to dividing the tasks. What are your strengths? Which one are you good at? And it’s not because I’m doing 50% or like, I’m, I’m doing this I don’t know, writing things. I have to do 50% you have to do 50%. It’s like, which one do you enjoy doing? Which one are you better at? And then how can we put on the same amount of work even though it’s not exactly in half like what’s being done.

Kevin Anthony 38:01
Absolutely. I forgot we did we skip that one on our list.

Céline Remy 38:04
Yeah. And it was so important we had to mention right. I’m going to go through the entire list.

Kevin Anthony 38:09
But we’re breezing through we’re halfway through already.

Céline Remy 38:12
All right.

Kevin Anthony 38:15
Next, avoid discussing work at home. So we’ve already talked about that setting clear boundaries. Never bring in a personal problem at work. We didn’t put that one on the list, but that’s a good one to just like you keep the business stuff out of personal you should keep the personal stuff at business. I set them

Céline Remy 38:32
Easier said than done for some

Kevin Anthony 38:34
for sure.

Céline Remy 38:34
Self-control, self-control,

Kevin Anthony 38:36
spend some decent meantime, we already talked about that one, take breaks and plan vacations. Now that’s important to that, to me that falls in the whole boundaries thing. You know, it’s like setting the boundary about when you need space when you need time. Next is before each other at a hard time. So we talked about that being each other’s cheerleaders have to respect for each other. Did we cover that know when to move out?

Kevin Anthony 39:03
That one was in regards when we were doing the research about like when you should get out of a particular business like it’s not working, whether it’s one of you or both of you or whatever. Do you have that that’s an interesting one? Okay. Dress for work. We covered that being professional, we covered them. Proper homework can help.

Céline Remy 39:24
Okay, while you’re listening to this Love, Love Episode, so you’re doing your homework about what to look for what to avoid, and how to prepare very well.

Kevin Anthony 39:31
There you go. cheer each other at times, we covered that one at times, divide your work, we’ve covered that one that’s actually done. This is a list of just different things we found across a bunch of different articles that we were reading. value your relationship, of course, of course, and dream big and together. I like that one. We didn’t have that. No, necessarily. I had it as know you why that’s true. You’re right. It does. kind of fall under know your why. Yeah.

Céline Remy 40:02
Headed at the base the foundation.

Kevin Anthony 40:05
Well, there you go. So I’m actually somewhat proud that we brainstorm that list ourselves first and then we kind of matched it up with what experts say and there’s a lot of overlap there. And that’s pretty cool. And I feel like we gave the listeners a lot of stuff like a lot of ideas and a lot of tips. So you got a giant fire hose full of tips for how to make this work.

Céline Remy 40:35
And it is possible to make it work you can be happy, thriving in love work and relationship.

Kevin Anthony 40:41
Absolutely. Alright, well, that is all the time we have for this episode. We hope that you found value in it and we will see you next week. We hope you liked this episode of the love lab podcast. If you enjoyed this show, leave a comment and share with your friends,

Céline Remy 41:01
and if you want more, we have an entire digital library with the best sex tips and Relationship Advice at Selena heymy.com. That’s CELINEREMY.com. So join us in the sex vault to continue this adventure.

Kevin Anthony 41:18
Thanks for listening,

Céline Remy 41:19
and remember, you’re amazing